


Consumed

by Shaw



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - College/University, Cannibalism, Drugs, Dubious Consent, Multi, Self-Mutilation, Sexual Language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-09
Updated: 2018-08-07
Packaged: 2019-06-07 19:27:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 20
Words: 25,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15226236
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shaw/pseuds/Shaw
Summary: The rash, the cravings, the bizarre relationship that was forged between him and his estranged brother-- It all started after the hazing ritual that forced Genji to eat raw meat. With so much on the line, will everyone make it out of this in one piece?





	1. Chapter One

Genji tapped his spoon against his plate absently, not entirely listening to what his mother and father were talking about across the table. He was more concerned with the fact that the only thing currently on his plate was mashed potatoes. The cafeteria they were currently in, because his father had insisted they have an ‘Authentic Abroad Meal’, had been mostly meat based. This left him and his family rather high and dry, considering they had been staunch vegetarians for as long as Genji could remember. 

 

He glanced up occasionally, mouth tight with dissatisfaction and hoping his parents saw and got the point that he wanted to leave. Go anywhere else to eat. The place was permeated with the smell of grease and what Genji assumed must’ve been steak. He wasn’t the best at differentiating between different meats.

 

This whole thing was only happening because he was going off to university finally. The same one his parents had gone to, the same one his brother was currently attending. He wasn’t sure how he felt about it. Sure, wild parties, but his parents actually expected him to study. Which was hilarious. He supposed he couldn’t blame them though, not after Hanzo had gotten… Weird. 

 

The thought of his brother made his stomach clench. It growled pitifully then. Genji groaned softly, lowering his head and setting his spoon down. This seemed to finally catch his father’s attention. 

 

“Sparrow? Are you okay, my son?” Genji neglected to answer, rather giving his father a frown paired with the best puppy dog eyes he could pull off. His father’s face softened and he ran a hand through his hair, looking to his wife. Genji’s mother was who he’d gotten his looks from, everyone told him so. He didn’t really see it, thought he looked more like his grandpa on his dad’s side than anyone else. 

 

“Love, perhaps we should go. I’m sure Genji is just bored! He wants to go get started on his big university adventure.” Yeah, sure. Genji rolled his eyes with a huff. He didn’t feel like correcting his mother. She was more excited about this whole thing than he was. After her eldest son had gone off on his own, she had fallen into the habit of treating Genji like he was an only child. Her, only child. 

 

Sojiro looked at his wristwatch, a small frown tugging the corners of his mouth down. Genji drummed his fingers impatiently. He really hoped the university campus had vending machines. He wasn’t entirely sure how things worked here, but any self respecting semi public place should have vending machines. 

 

“Yes, yes… We must be keeping Hanzo waiting. Are you excited to see your brother again, Genji? It’s been a while, hasn’t it…” Even if his mother had given up on Hanzo, the boy’s father still loved him to pieces. Either that or it was a business thing. Hell if Genji knew. Personally he liked to tell himself it was because Sojiro loved his sons. 

 

“Yeah,” Genji answered, some truth peeking out behind his apathetic tone. “I am. It’s been forever.” I wish he called, Genji’s inner voice murmured. He squashed it down. No need to get overly sentimental about it. Hanzo and him hadn’t been on the best terms since the guy left. 

 

Despite his tone of voice, Genji’s answer pleased Sojiro immensely. His mother’s own tight lipped smile told a different story; Genji tried his best to ignore her for the time being. He loved his mother, he did, really. She was just a little much sometimes. Must’ve been who he got it from. 

 

“Then, let’s get going.” Sojiro said, standing.


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hanzo had changed. Sue him, but Genji had trouble accepting this fact.

Hanzo was late. Why it still surprised Genji, he couldn’t fathom. His parents had long since left him standing in the parking lot, his jacket pulled tight around him as he stared at his phone. He’d been scrolling social media for the past hour and it was starting to get stale. He switched to this text messages and sent Hanzo another passive aggressive message about punctuality.

 

It frustrated Genji beyond belief. These past couple years had been a total role reversal. Hanzo was supposed to be the one that was always on time and got onto him for being late. Not the other way around. Genji was the one that was supposed to forget to call, not Hanzo. Hanzo was the responsible one, the one his parents adored. Genji just wished he knew why things had gotten so askew. 

 

Eventually, a car pulled into the parking lot. Genji’s heart skipped a beat for a moment, unsure of if the person behind the blacked out windows was Hanzo or not. Eventually, it stopped nearby and the windows rolled down. Genji heaved a sigh of relief. 

 

“Genji.” 

 

“Hanzo.” The greeting was unfamiliar and tense, but Genji didn’t care. He was just glad it wasn’t some rando. Getting abducted in a foreign country was on the bottom of the list of things he wanted to do. He walked around the car and went to open the door, finding it locked. The passenger window rolled down. Genji blinked. Hanzo was smiling at him. 

 

“What’s the matter- Get in.” Genji pulled the door again. Still locked. He scowled despite himself and scoffed out a laugh. Hanzo shook his head and unlocked the car door finally. Genji clamored in, tugging his stuff with him and throwing it into the back seat. 

 

The two brothers rode in silence for some time before Hanzo did the honors of breaking the silence. 

 

“Your hair. It looks nice.” Genji looked up from his lap, staring at Hanzo’s profile intently. It was a little too dark to make out his features properly. Running a hand through his hair with a sudden spike of self consciousness, Genji laughed softly. 

 

“Yeah? Mom threw a fit. She was all like, ‘Any color but green, Genji!’ Funny, she said the same thing when I dyed it pink.” Hanzo laughed softly, and it made Genji sit up a little straighter. He stared at him again for some time, unsure of what else to say. Should he compliment him back? He didn’t know what to say. 

 

“Can I turn on the radio?” He blurted. Hanzo’s eyes flickered from the road to side glance Genji. He got a shrug in response as one of Hanzo’s hands came to rest in his lap. Genji observed him driving one handed with some dismay. He remembered when Hanzo was first learning to drive. The guy always drove with his hands tight on the wheel, white knuckled grip. 

 

“Thanks…” At least the din of music would help drown out some of the suffocating silence. Genji tapped the button only to recoil in shock. The car was suddenly flooded with loud, fast paced music. He quickly turned the knob down, teeth gritted. It seemed each time he so much as moved a muscle, something new and fantastically awful presented itself to him. 

 

“Oh, sorry. Forgot I had the volume up.” Hanzo’s apology was half hearted. Genji’s stomach continued to tie itself in painful knots, a mix of hurt and hunger making his whole body ache. He shuffled through the unfamiliar stations, trying to find something that sounded at least somewhat familiar. Eventually he heard the voice of a famous pop singer and stilled his knob fiddling. This would do for now. Hanzo made some sort of noise of distaste at Genji’s choice. At least something had stayed the same. 

 

“We’re almost there.” Genji perked up, peering through the darkness to find the building. It was easy enough to spot, the large bland looking complexes were only recognizable due to towering over the surrounding buildings. For once since this whole thing had begun, Genji felt excited. He turned to Hanzo, a smile starting to form before it fell unexpectedly and he looked back to his lap. God, this was unbearably weird. 

 

“Umi is going to be happy to see you.” Umi! Genji had totally forgotten about that mutt. The Shimada’s had always kept two Inus at a time. The most recent pair had been split up when Hanzo took the Akita with him to university. Genji hadn’t seen her in forever and a day. He had a little trouble even believing the old dog was still alive. 

 

“Soba would’ve liked to see you too, you know. I bet she’d have liked seeing Umi--” The words were out of his mouth before Genji could stop them. He swallowed thickly as a tension spiked. Hanzo shifted in his seat and abruptly whipped into a parking lot, causing Genji to slide in his seat and slam into the door. He let out a noise of pain at this, getting a strained and insincere apology in return. 

 

Unwarranted tears stung at Genji’s eyes as he tried to swallow down his feelings. He didn’t want to have a fight with Hanzo. Not right now. Maybe tomorrow morning, after he’d gotten settled in. Then he could dig into him for all the bullshit he’d pulled since leaving. Yeah, that sounded like a plan. 

 

Eventually, Hanzo stopped in front of the dormitory building. Genji supposed this was where he got off. He unbuckled his seatbelt with haste, leaning back to grab his bags. Hanzo turned off the radio while Genji was distracted, fingers drumming against the wheel. As Genji was getting out, awkwardly moving around his luggage, Hanzo spoke up. 

 

“Genji…” He looked up and for the first time since they’d met up, Hanzo was actually looking him in the eye. “I’ll see you later.” 

 

“Yeah… You will.” Genji answered matter-of-factly. Later turned out to be a little earlier than Genji anticipated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote two chapters in one sitting and sure they're not long but this is wild. Third one on the way as we speak! Let's hope I don't chicken out and leave this as an orphaned piece aha... For those wondering, this is based off the movie Raw (2016) and was inspired by a piece of art I found on tumblr! I'll link the picture eventually, don't worry.


	3. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The party's just getting started but two weeks sounds easy enough to survive.

The sound of hooting and hollering was what woke Genji up. It wasn’t the fact his mattress was on the floor, or that his sheets had been lost somewhere in the move, or even that he was sleeping directly under a window for a light happened to be situated. None of that woke him up. It was the noise. That, and another guy busting into his room while he was in the middle of putting on pants. 

 

The man who was standing before him was in a similar state of undress as himself, looking like he’d just rolled out of bed. Which he likely had. His brown hair was sticking up awkwardly in a couple of places, like he’d been sweating in his sleep and it had stuck it like that. Genji’s eyes narrowed as he rubbed the crust off of them. 

 

“Who are you? What’s going on?” The guy blinked at him, like he’d just asked the stupidest questions ever. Maybe he had. Genji didn’t know. He was still half asleep. 

 

“I’m your roommate. What’s goin’ on-- well, I’d reckon it’s a hazing.” Hazing? Hazing... Fuck. Wait. 

 

“I requested no roommate.” Genji’s skin prickled with dissatisfaction. That had been his only request. No roommate. He was a social person at heart but he did not want someone in his personal space all hours of the day. His new roommate shrugged, broad shoulders rising and falling with great nonchalance. 

 

“Can’t always get what’cha want in life, now can ya?” It was then someone came in behind Roommate Guy, grabbing him by the bicep and pulling him out of the room with a yell. Genji started, fumbling for a shirt or jacket. He managed to find a hoodie right as several more strangers invaded his room. As he was being shoved out he watched as they opened up the window and tipped his bed out it. 

 

He was shoved along until finally meeting a crowd of similarly undressed strangers all around his age. He quickly picked his roommate out of the lot of them, seeing as he stood over most. Genji decided it was best to just follow along with whatever the Hell was going on, sliding over to Roommate Guy as he inspected the situation. 

 

“I’m Jesse by the way.” The sudden conversation starter spooked Genji momentarily before he regained his calm. He flashed a grin, tilting his head up so he could get a good look at Roommate Jesse. 

 

“Genji; You said this was a hazing? I thought people stopped doing that forever ago.” Jesse stared at him for a moment, seeming to be gauging if he was serious or not. He then laughed in his face. Genji felt the back of his neck heat up slightly at this, a strange flush of embarrassment swamping him as he pulled on the strings of his hoodie. 

 

“So, you’re not from around here then, huh? Figures. Naw, no shame. You’re kinda right though, most people stopped doin’ hazings a while back. Dunno what this one’s gonna be, but I’d not be lettin’ my guard down if I was you.” Jesse turned his back to Genji now, looking over people’s heads as more shouting erupted for seemingly no reason. Someone was trying to go back into their room. 

 

“Where do you think you’re going?” Someone yelled. She was tall and dark, with piercing eyes. The girl she was yelling at, someone significantly shorter than her, blinked blankly before smiling and laughing. Unawares, Genji mused. 

 

“To bed? Is the asscrack’a the night, loves. A lady needs her beauty sleep.” At the charming and truthful response, the other woman laughed heartily and slapped the younger woman on the arm. She winced slightly but took it in stride, a confused look on her freckled face. 

 

“You can’t go to bed now, Rookie. It’s not there! You wanna sleep? You best get your ass in gear. Go find your bedding. It’s out there.” The woman tilted her head towards one of the hallway windows, a grin on her face. The younger woman slowly frowned, looking less than pleased about this revelation. Genji would have felt pity for her if the whole thing hadn’t been hilarious to watch. 

 

He was in the same boat, of course. He’d actually watched them throw his stuff out the window. He heard Jesse muttering under his breath about something to do with all of this, but deigned to ignore it. The group was corralled with shoving and hitting down and out, into the open night. One of the older students stepped up, onto what Genji couldn’t see. It was some guy with a beanie on and a serious face. His voice was loud and clear over the collective murmuring and complaining of the tired group. 

 

“Hello, Rookies! You are gathered here today to undertake your first test in becoming real members of this school. We are your Elders, your Great Ones! We will guide you, teach you, nurture you… But only if you prove yourself worthy to do so.” Genji heard Jesse scoff at the speech. It did sound kinda stupid, if he thought about it longer than one second. They got dragged out of bed for this? 

 

“This trial of yours will last two weeks! Tonight, we party! The catch? None of you go to bed until every last one of us Elders has done so.” Genji groaned and he wasn’t alone in doing so. He wasn’t a stranger to partying, in fact he enjoyed it quite a bit, but he was tired. He was tired and didn’t feel like being forced to party the whole night away. Whatever, he supposed he’d live. Hopefully they had good booze. 

 

“Try to contain your excitement, Rookies! The real tests will begin soon enough. Now-- To the basement!” The self-proclaimed Elders started to holler again, fists pumping in the air. The Rookies had no choice but to follow, Genji supposed, or face some kind of preordained wrath that would likely make them miserable for the next two weeks. He’d take a hard pass. Getting blackout drunk sounded less troublesome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh? Me? Slopping shit together in a rush because I can't control the wild, fickle muse that has taken ahold of me? Maybe. Comments appreciated! Kudos too, but I like to hear what my readers are thinking about. Thanks for reading!


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Making friends is easy when you're all drunk as Hell.

The deep bass of the music was familiar, enveloping. The buzz of hard liquor a sedative to the crankiness Genji would be feeling if it hadn’t been for the round of shots he’d partaken in. There were so many bodies to wade through that it was nearly impossible to move without being pressed flush against someone. Hands would roam momentarily before being breezily swat away, Genji frankly uninterested in making too many mistakes tonight. 

 

It was hard to find his way out, frankly. It had been fine at first, but for his lack of ability to find the exit a subtle panic had set in. So Genji stood still for awhile, vainly trying to recollect his wits about him in the strobing darkness. He didn’t know who had grabbed him and was pulling him along but he didn’t think to question it. Whoever it was, he wanted to get on his hands and knees and kiss the ground they walked upon. 

 

Genji and his savior stumbled into the cool, dry night air wrapped in each other arms. It was hard to tell who was supporting who at the moment given the pair seemed to be equally drunkenly unsettled. When Genji finally raised his blurry gaze up he was nearly knocked sober. 

 

“Oh my God… Hanzo, what’d you do to your face?” The dim but consistent lighting of the outside highlighted Hanzo’s piercings. Genji was honestly not surprised that it was Hanzo who’d pulled him out of the mess he had been in; what he was surprised about was how drunk his brother seemed to be and of course his new facial decorations. 

 

“Did you really just notice?” Hanzo slurred out in response, smiling meanly as he tried to right his balance. Genji started to fall back as a result, pulling himself up on Hanzo in turn. The two swayed dangerously before falling back against the wall together and slumping down to the ground in tandem. 

 

“Don’t be a dick.” Was the biting response Genji finally managed to get out, fingers curling tightly into the fabric of Hanzo’s shirt. He swallowed wetly and stilled, taking a deep breath. 

 

“Whatever,” A pause as Hanzo seemed to contemplate something. Genji thought it was because he was trying not to vomit. That was, until he spoke again. “Do you not like it?” 

 

Genji blinked at Hanzo in surprise, giving the bridge piercing another inspection in particular. It wasn’t bad necessarily. Just… Different. Weird. Genji moved his jaw in thought, not noticing that Hanzo’s expression had shifted from drunken leisure to one of apprehension. He finally conceded with a shrug, not really sure how to answer. 

“Is alright…” Hanzo’s mouth pulled taunt momentarily, seeming displeased with the answer, but before Genji could try to correct the perceived wrong, Hanzo had moved onto other topics. Genji really wished it was these things about Hanzo that had changed instead. 

 

“You were completely frozen in there. Had too much to drink?” Genji scoffed. Too much to drink? The fact he could still recognize faces said he hadn’t had enough to drink. Hanzo chuckled lowly at Genji’s reaction, leaning his head back against the wall and staring up into the night sky. The dim glow of the city blocked out most of the stars, but there was still more visible than what Genji was used to. 

 

“I’m only getting started, you know. What, you think just because you spent a couple years here that suddenly you can out drink me?” Genji’s jeer was met with an unusually dark expression in return. Hanzo merely clucked his tongue in reprimand. 

 

“I see you still have no respect for your elders.” 

 

“You’re my older brother, not my fucking grandpa. Get over yourself.” With a small shove, Genji tried to make his point as clear as possible without inciting any real hard feelings. He wasn’t quite sure how New Hanzo worked yet. What would set him off and what wouldn’t. It was a relief when Genji heard his brother snort back a laugh and hiccup weirdly, a hand briefly raising towards his mouth before falling back to his lap. 

 

“Gabriel is going to eat you alive if you don’t get a clue, you know.”

 

“Who?”

 

“Beanie guy.” Genji made a small noise of recognition, nodding sagely. Yeah, that guy seemed like he ate ‘Rookies’ for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Twisting the strings of his hoodie around his fingers, Genji sat in contemplation. His mind was too fuzzy to form many coherent thoughts. It was just about then that a girl stumbled out through the same door the brothers themselves had come through. It took about half a minute but Genji eventually recognized her as she emptied the contents of her stomach out directly onto the concrete all of three yards away from them. 

 

It was the girl from the hallway. She seemed like she was having fun. Hanzo slowly clamored up from his spot on the ground and walked in as straight a line he could muster over to the girl, hesitantly placing a hand on her stooped back as she heaved dryly. 

 

“Hey. Hey, Rookie.” Genji watched the interaction from his spot on the ground. He wasn’t feeling particularly up to standing at the moment. The woman raised her head finally, gaze not all there. Hanzo made a face that Genji recognized all too well and slowly helped her away from the pool of her own vomit the best he could. 

 

He sat her next to Genji. She looked at Genji blankly, muttering something about someone or other. Genji wagged his fingers at her in greeting to which she responded with a small two fingered salute and a watery smile. Hanzo took a seat once more on the other side of her. 

 

“Abs’lutely bonkers party, huh? Think they’re tryna kill us is what’sit is.” 

 

“Ana must’ve gotten to her.” Hanzo mused aloud. She perked a bit in recognition and gesticulated inarticulately. 

 

“That’s it, innit! That’s her, right, sure! Real pretty lady. If it weren’t for me bein’ in love an’ all she’d be, she’d be on my radar, if you, know what I mean.” Genji snorted at this, brows arching up as he observed the woman next to him. She was elfish, kindof. She had a nice face though, one that felt like you could really count on her for a good time. 

 

“I’m Genji.” It took the woman a second to respond as she tried out Genji’s name in her mouth, smacking her lips around it as if she could taste it. For some reason Genji found this absolutely hilarious. 

 

“ ‘m Lena. Oxton. Some people call me Tracer, though I haven’t quite figured out why just yet. You ever figure it, tell me, woul’ja?” Despite Genji not offering a hand to shake, Lena reached forward and took the initiative to start shaking hands anyways. Despite her drunkenness and previously haggard state, she was incredibly lively. Hopefully this meant she wasn’t going to black out and die on them like Genji thought she was going to. 

 

“Love? Are you out here?” Water! Genji spotted the bottles of water before he even registered that there was a person carrying them. Lena started to squirm next to Genji, arms reaching out for the woman who was thus unnamed. 

 

“Babe! Baby! I love you so much, you’re the light of my life!” Babe, as Genji was now assured was what he was going to call her from now on, took one look at the scene around her and seemed to go through the seven stages of grief in a split second. She gave Genji and Hanzo a passing glance before making a silent decision. The water bottles landed in their laps easily, Genji gurgling out some kind of gushy thank you as he uncapped it and chugged. 

 

“I see you’ve already managed to make more friends, Lena.” 

 

“Yeah, this here’s Genji. An’ uh…” Lena stared at Hanzo. Hanzo stared back. Babe looked between the two before looking at Genji and giving him a stressed little smile. He smiled back and hoped he didn’t look like a total idiot. Being drunk was fun until someone was sober. Babe seemed very sober. 

 

“Hanzo. That’s my brother.” Genji offered finally. Lena gasped softly and whipped around to Genji, falling into him. Babe gently separated the two. Genji was starting to wonder if Babe had a name or not. 

 

“No way, huh? That’s gotta be convenient for you an’ all. Havin’ a brother on the Council of Elders or is whatever they’re callin’ themselves.” 

 

“Not really.” Genji answered. He surprised himself by telling the truth. He could feel Hanzo’s stare drilling into him. 

 

“Is a shame, is what that is then.” Lena finally took a break from blabbering to start drinking some of the water Babe had supplied for her. Babe then finally took the initiative to introduce herself. 

 

“Sorry to be rude. ‘m Emily. Most my friends just call me Em. I hope it’s alright that Lena and I are out here with you. Is a lil crazy in there, ain’t it? Can hardly breath.” Emily laugh softly as she slowly lowered herself to sit across from Lena, who Genji had so far gathered was likely because they were girlfriends. He was drunk, not stupid. 

“It’s fine. Probably won’t remember much of this later anyways.” Genji assured. Emily shook her head but smiled nonetheless. 

 

“You guys have a long night ahead of you.” Hanzo warned, getting up. He seemed to have regained some of his motor skills. Genji watched his brother stretch before he walked off and back inside without another word. Emily also watched him go before looking back to Genji. 

 

“I’ll be straight with ya, Genji. ‘m just gonna stay out here the rest’a the night. Don’t really like drinking enough to sit through all’a this an’ Lena’s already got too much in her as it is. You wanna sit with us? Wouldn’t mind the company.” Genji felt a warmth spread through his chest at the invitation, dumbly laughing in reply as he wrapped an arm around Lena’s shoulders and leaned into her chummily. 

 

“You know, I don’t think I’d mind either.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The subtle nuance among accents and dialects is a mystery to properly convey when a lot of it boils down to grammatical structure and the inclusion or subtraction of letters. That's not even throwing it slang vernacular. Weeping as we speak. Anyways I love Lena!


	5. Chapter Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They were brothers, but only in name. Genji wished it were any other way.

Jesse needed help. It wasn’t entirely surprising that he had to come to Genji for help, actually. Despite the latters various attempts to keep Jesse at an arm’s distance, he just kept coming back to try and buddy up. It was endearing and annoying all at once; if Jesse hadn’t been half as good looking as he was, Genji would have turned him away once and for all. Call him vain if you must but Genji had standards for the kinds of people he hung out with. 

 

“This barely counts as clothes.” Genji was shuffling through his closet while Jesse looked at himself in the full length mirror that sat against the wall. He had squeezed his broad chest into one of Genji’s shirts, the article usually worn loose was fit snugly on the man’s body. 

 

“It’s this or you get back in your diaper, you big baby.” Genji sniped back, frowning as he pulled out another shirt to try. Jesse cast a mean look over his shoulder but said nothing. The Elders had recently started to enforce a dress code-- Nightclub themed. Jesse had been left high and dry, what with wardrobe consisting of western shirts, jeans, and cowboy boots. Thus, as punishment, he’d been made to walk around wearing a diaper or suffer worse consequences. Genji didn’t know if the diaper had been Jesse’s first choice or not but apparently whatever the worse consequences were had been enough to make Jesse bow out. 

 

“Try this one.” Genji tossed the next shirt Jesse’s way and watched him make a face. 

 

“Where in the Hell is the rest of it?” Genji snorted back a laugh. 

 

“It’s a crop top, idiot. That’s all of it.” A look of anguish passed over Jesse’s face as he sighed and peeled off the shirt he was already wearing. He passed it back to Genji who examined it for too much stretching. 

 

“This looks ridiculous.” It’d be a bold faced lie to say Genji didn’t find some satisfaction from this. He didn’t know anything of Jesse’s past but whatever it was like it’d left him in really good shape. As he watched the man struggle his way into the crop top, he got to admire him without shame. 

 

“Nah, it looks good. Can we maybe speed this up? I have things to do.” Jesse made a face at this, trying vainly to tug the crop top further down his stomach. This shirt sat tighter than the last, strained over Jesse’s chest and shoulders. Genji would have worried about the guy ripping it if he actually cared. Plus, that would’ve been kind of hot actually. 

 

“I think I preferred the other one.” 

 

“Eh… I think not. Wear that one, you look fine. Plus, I actually like the other one; I don’t need you stretching it all out and ruining it.” Genji gave Jesse a cheeky smile for his worries, eyes narrowed as the guy gave him a difficult look and huffed. Eventually he stopped tugging at the top and crossed his arms over his stomach. Genji didn’t take him for the self conscious type. It was sort of cute. 

 

“Whatever. Thanks, I think? Beats havin’ to wear a fuckin’ diaper ‘round town. I’m gonna spit on Reyes for makin’ me wear that shit.” Humming in response, Genji closed up shop, putting away any extra clothes he had pulled out. Jesse shuffled in place before looking back to Genji. 

 

“Where’re you off to, anyways?” It took him a moment to consider if he actually liked Jesse asking that question. Stretching his arms up over his head, Genji sighed. 

 

“My business, cowboy. Why, miss me already?” Jesse gave a sarcastic laugh at this, rubbing his forearms. For a second, Genji thought he’d actually hit a nerve. He hoped he didn’t. If Jesse was getting attached this easily, that was going to be a big problem. 

 

“Naw, just wanna make sure where to avoid, if ya catch my drift.” With a tut and a shake of his head, Genji waved Jesse off. In all truth, he was going to go see if Hanzo was actually in his room. For once the guy had actually texted him. It had just been a simple ‘Come over’ with his his room location but it was more than Genji had gotten from him in a while. 

 

“I’ll see you later. If Lena stops by, just tell her I’ll meet up with her when I can.” A vague noise of acknowledgement was the most Genji got out of Jesse as he bounced off, something a bit like excitement but a lot more like anxiety bubbling under his skin. 

 

Before Genji knew it he was standing in front of Hanzo’s door, hand raised to knock. He didn’t know what was stopping him. He just knew he suddenly felt sick to his stomach. Swallowing tightly, Genji lowered his hand and took a deep breath. 

 

He would be fine. This was going to be fine. 

 

“Hey. Are you going to come in or not?” Genji quite literally jumped as Hanzo abruptly opened the door. He fumbled over himself for a moment, smoothing at his hair and clothes. 

 

“How did you know I was here?” 

 

“I could smell you.” Genji laughed nervously at this, mainly because the way Hanzo had said it made it not sound like a joke. He had showered, he swore. With a tip of his head, Hanzo gestured for Genji to enter. He did so, stiffly taking single large step past the threshold. Most of his anxieties immediately melted away when he heard a soft bark and the sound of something four legged running. 

 

“Umi!” Dropping to his knees, Genji held his arms out for the dog. She barreled right into him, all wiggles and tongue. Despite Hanzo standing over him, Genji didn’t feel so bad anymore. With a heave, Genji picked up the dog. She was heavy, but Genji had grown since last attempting to hold her. 

 

“Look at her, she’s an old woman! She’s all grey in the muzzle now.” He commented as he smiled at her. He looked to Hanzo, chest clenching at the fond look he had on his face. 

 

“She knew you were here before I did. I had to calm her down before I could answer the door.” Hanzo finally said. The previous comment Hanzo had made felt more light hearted now. Shifting his grip to let Umi down, Genji smiled slightly. She walked circles around his legs before going to sit at Hanzo’s feet. The man had crossed his arms over his chest, leaned back against the wall. 

 

“So….” Genji finally said, after a moment’s pause. Hanzo was watching him carefully. He could only wonder why. Unconsciously, he rubbed at his face. A twitch of a smile betrayed Hanzo as he shook his head. 

 

“I just wanted to check on you. Make sure you weren’t in any trouble. I know how you are.” Genji could help the little noise of indignation he made in response, disbelief that New Hanzo was actually talking to him about being a troublemaker. 

 

“I’m fine. It’s only been like, a day. What kind of trouble could I have possibly gotten into?” Hanzo shrugged at this, a soft ‘eh’ in response. 

 

“You have a penchant for getting into things, Genji. You and I both know this.” Genji wanted to argue that Hanzo didn’t know him at all, not after all this time, but found his words caught in his throat. It was a blessing in disguise, really. Genji had to remind himself to stop trying to lash out. This was going well. They were actually talking. Really, actually talking.

 

“Can we sit down?” He finally managed instead, voice still slightly tight. Rather than answer, Hanzo walked off. Genji followed for better or worse. Thankfully, Hanzo had led him to his bedroom. Despite the rest of the space being rather clean, this room was a mess. There was clothes everywhere and posters covered the walls. If it weren’t for the bands and movies on said posters being totally outside of Genji’s sphere of interest, he would have thought they’d walked right back into his room instead of Hanzo’s. 

 

“Sit wherever.” Hanzo said with all the nonchalance of someone who didn’t seem to see anything wrong. He kicked a pair of boxers up and into a laundry hamper that was clearly not being used properly and then flopped onto his bed. Genji took a seat at the foot of said bed, hands in his lap and looking about as awkward as he felt. Umi hopped up next to him and laid her head on his thighs. 

 

“When did you get into metal?” Genji finally asked, voice small. 

 

“Two years ago or so.” He nodded, not sure why he did so. He wanted to kick himself but settled with petting Umi instead, scratching behind her ears and praying that somehow talking to Hanzo would magically get easier. 

 

“How’s your friend?” 

 

“Huh?” 

 

“Your friend. Lena.” Duh. Who else would he had been talking about? Genji tried to laugh it off but the way Hanzo just stared at him made him feel like maybe he knew better. 

 

“Oh, she’s alright. She lived, I mean. Probably thanks to Emily. They’re cool, though. Lena got here on a track scholarship. Says she wants to go to the Olympics.” Talking about someone else was so much easier than actually talking to Hanzo. Genji could just regurgitate things that had been said to him already and not worry about saying anything new or original. Hanzo didn’t seem to care so why should he? 

 

“That’s good…” Genji couldn’t shake the discomfort creeping under his skin at how Hanzo was just, staring at him. He swallowed tightly as he watched his brother’s jaw work like he was mulling something over. Last time Genji checked, Hanzo liked to avoid staring at people like this. New Hanzo must’ve lost that somewhere in translation. 

 

“Your next trial is coming up soon. Tomorrow, actually.” Hanzo said suddenly. Genji gave a strained laugh and shrugged casually. 

 

“Yeah? No biggie. So far this has been a cake walk.” That wasn’t a lie. Genji had expected much, much worse. He’d heard horror stories about hazing rituals. Whatever they were going to come up with next would probably be tame. The only people these trials seemed to hurt were people like Jesse. 

 

“Yeah, sure.” A span of silence followed. Genji fidgeted in place, gently pushing Umi off of him even if it made him feel bad. Turning around to kneel in front of Hanzo, he frowned. Hanzo didn’t bother to move, still reclined back with his hands behind his head. He arched an eyebrow up at his little brother but said nothing. 

 

“Hanzo… Was it hard? For you, I mean. All of this?” For the first time, genuine emotion seemed to twist Hanzo’s features. A tight frown accompanied with a dip of his brow and a twitch of the eye. Genji bit his lip and waited for something, anything. 

 

“... Yeah. It was. I’m not like you. It didn’t come naturally.” 

 

“Are you like me now?” The question came out a little meaner than Genji meant it to. Hanzo’s gaze returned to Genji full force and he felt like he’d had the wind knocked out of him. The smile he gave Genji was grim and full of secrets. 

 

“No, I’m not. Far from it.” There was a sort of malice under the statement that made Genji’s stomach churn. Mouth pressed thin, he tried to think of anything else to talk about. To divert the encounter from falling to disaster. He hadn’t even been here that long, he couldn’t just ruin it like this. With all the wild abandon of a man who had nothing left to lose, Genji threw himself down onto the bed next to Hanzo and curled up against his side. Hanzo tensed but said nothing. 

 

“You’re dumb…” The half hearted insult glanced off Hanzo. Genji knew it would. He merely sat there, hands curled up under his head as he sighed. Hanzo’s arm eventually came down and gently looped under him. It was bizarre. They hadn’t done something like this since they were kids. Hanzo smelled like soap, something stronger, and a bit like a handful of coins. It was a confusing mixture of scents but Genji didn’t bother to question it. 

 

“You’re still my little brother, you know.” Hanzo’s voice sounded raw, betraying the neutral expression on his face. Genji sniffled pitifully, tears threatening his attempts to maintain some form of composure. Hanzo’s hand fisted against Genji’s back, blunt nails scraping at the skin underneath as he did so. 

 

“I know. I just wish…” The idea trailed off. Hanzo made a noise of inquiry. Genji swallowed and continued. “I just wish you were still my brother too.” 

 

“I am. I am.” The exchange felt strained and desperate, like Hanzo was trying to convince more than just Genji. Genji wiped at his face and took a deep breath. 

 

“Why didn’t you call? You didn’t even call.” No answer. Genji had known there wouldn’t be. There was no reason, he figured. No reason good or bad. Just an empty space. And so they sat in silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Angst, angst, angst, angst. I told myself this chapter wouldn't be angst, but then it happened anyways. Hopefully the next chapter will not be as bad, but it might be worse. Don't forget to leave comments, kudos, and share with your pals! Thanks for reading, until next time, addio


	6. Chapter Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flesh and blood and sore stomachs. Something's wrong, he can feel it.

Genji stared at the hand extended to him and slowly followed the arm up to the face of the person it belong to. It was Gabriel, go figure. Ana stood at his side, pouring shots of whiskey and passing them to the people who had already passed their trial. 

 

“I can’t eat that.” Genji insisted. Gabriel didn’t seem amused and merely shook his hand, the hunk of meat trapped between his fingers bouncing with the movement. 

 

“You’re going to.” He said plainly. Ana eyed Genji. He was holding up the line but he wasn’t backing down. Jesse stood at his side, Lena a little ways away with Emily watching with a worried expression. 

 

“I’m a vegetarian. I’m not going to eat that.” He’d been fine with everything else. Being forced to get drunk and party the night away with no reprieve? Sure! Dress like a slut with a bunch of strangers? Fine! Get doused in pig’s blood? Fuck it, whatever. This though? This was too much. 

 

“Rookie…” Ana warned, eyes narrowing. Genji didn’t care. He stared her down, gritting his teeth. Gabriel turned away and waved at someone. Hanzo came over soon after, eyeing Genji warily. 

 

“This is your brother, right?” He looked between Genji and Hanzo, waiting for an answer from either of them. Hanzo answered first in confirmation. Genji frowned at how he did so.

 

“Hanzo, tell them. I’m not going to eat that. I can’t.” That in question was rabbit kidneys. They had whole fucking jars of the things, fresh and bloody. Genji wasn’t sure where they got them but it made him sick to his stomach. 

 

“He’s saying he’s vegetarian? That true?” Gabriel inquired. Genji and Hanzo stared at one another pointedly. Then Hanzo shrugged. It felt more like a slap to the face to Genji. 

 

“Stop being a baby, Genji.” With that said, Hanzo fished one of the kidneys out of the jar and pushed his bloodied fingers past his lips, grabbing one of the whiskey shots to wash it down. The blood sat on his lips in a smear. Genji watched, sickened, as he licked it off. He heard Jesse at his side sigh in agitation. Genji elbowed him to keep his mouth shut. He was already on thin ice. He didn’t need to fuck this up for himself and Genji. 

 

“Eat up.” Hanzo had another bloodied kidney in hand and a shot in the other. He pushed it towards Genji mouth. Despite already being covered in animal blood, Genji shied away from Hanzo’s bloodied fingers. Pressing his mouth closed, he shook his head. Hanzo sneered at him. 

 

“Don’t be a coward. You already came this far. What happened to this being a cake walk? Eat the damn meat and go.” Heart hammering against his ribs at the reprimand and a strange shame overcoming him, Genji slowly slackened his jaw. Hanzo’s fingers pushed past his lips and into his mouth, forcing the meat in with it. It was gross. Lukewarm with a taste that Genji could only call flesh. 

 

He held it in his mouth stubbornly, not wanting to chew it, not wanting to swallow it. Hanzo’s stare bore into him and eventually he could not prolong the inevitable. He was forced to chew it just enough to get it down. He proceeded to choke the meat down with a small moan of protest, desperately grabbing the shot to wash away the taste. 

 

“Finally. Get over yourself, Rookie.” Gabriel hit Genji in the arm before shoving him aside. Lena swooped in with Emily at her side, both wearing expression of worry. Genji clutched his stomach as it churned in displeasure, letting the two women lead him away. 

 

“Jeez, Genji, you look right green in the gills. Those assholes shouldn’t’ve made you eat that.” Lena shot a glare the seniors way, one arm thrown over Genji’s shoulders as he groaned softly and swallowed. He felt like he was going to barf. He might. Maybe that would help. The three of them sat on the grass now, picking at the blood that was drying on their skin. Jesse eventually joined them, looking just as displeased with the whole situation. 

 

“That… That was more like a hazing.” He said, wiping at the blood covering his face. It sat thickly in his brow and bangs, clinging to his eyelashes. Genji nodded in agreement. Lena’s mouth curled in an odd way as she shook her head. She twined her fingers with Emily’s where they rested on Genji’s back. 

 

“Well, we lived. Hopefully none of us contract anythin’, huh?” Emily added in hopefully. Lena looked to her with a smile, some of the blood dripping down out of her hair having founds its way to her teeth. Emily laughed at her good naturedly. 

 

“You figure they were bluffin’ about making us all walk ‘round covered in this? It’s itching something fierce now.” Lena muttered after a span of oddly comfortable silence. Genji laughed softly, stomach having stopped squirming in protest for the time being. Lena had been on the outskirts of the group and thus had the least amount of blood on her out of them all. If anyone should be complaining it was Jesse. The poor guy was soaked. At least he hadn’t been wearing Genji’s shirt when it happened. 

 

Turns out they were serious about making them walk around covered in blood. None of the teachers questioned it, but some did laugh a bit at their students. Genji felt gross about it. The clash of the ruddy color against the green of his hair was garish. 

 

The first thing he did when he got back to his room was immediately monopolize the shower. Jesse complained the whole time, but quickly shut his mouth when Genji told him to just join him then if he was so impatient. This allowed him to shower in peace. Or, relative peace. 

 

Genji’s stomach kept jumping, something like an ache deep inside making him squirm as he tried to focus on scrubbing the blood off of himself. The first hard cramp knocked the wind out of him and he doubled over with a gasp, bracing himself against the wall. He waited, face twisted from the pain. Then it hit again. And again. Slowly, he crumpled to the ground. Genji sat there clutching at his abdomen-- his mind blank from the pain flooding his senses. 

 

Eventually, a knock on the door brought him back to reality with a gasp. The water was running ice cold now. 

 

“Genji? Are you okay?” Jesse sounded genuinely worried. Panting heavily, Genji gently prodded at his stomach. The cramps were gone but somehow his insides felt tender. It was like someone had twisted a knife around in his guts. 

 

“Yeah... Yeah, I’m fine. Hold on.” He turned the water off quickly, shivering something terrible as he clamored out and grabbed a towel. Drying off as quickly as possible, Genji couldn’t help checking for any spotting. He hadn’t had a period in years but he’d also never eaten meat before. How was he supposed to know if it would affect him or not? 

 

Both his fingers and the toilet paper came back free of blood. Genji made a mental note to run to the drugstore to pick up some pads just in case. 

 

Genji exited the bathroom after brushing his teeth and hair, towel wrapped around his waist as he made his way to his room. Jesse was reclined in front of the TV on the floor, video game controller in hand. He gave Genji a passing glance, eyes lingering slightly before he turned back to the game he was playing. If Genji didn’t feel so off he might’ve teased him for it. Maybe next time. 

 

For now though, he just wanted to sleep; Hopefully tomorrow wouldn’t be so awful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love dropping subtle hints that things are going terrible. 8^)


	7. Chapter Seven

The rash set in sometime during the night. When Genji had woken up, it covered his body in angry, red patches that he had mostly managed to claw open during the night. He only vaguely remembered waking up to itch-- he hadn’t realized how dire it was. He avoided Jesse’s curious and concerned gaze, embarrassed at the state of himself; Didn’t warn Lena that he would be taking the day off to hide away in his room. He simply escorted himself to the on campus nurse. 

 

That was how he got here, sitting in silence as he sucked on a shitty sugar free lollipop that tasted more like medicine than candy. The nurse was examining the raw, opened skin on his back, prodding gently with gloved hands as she made conversation. 

 

“You look like you really did a number on yourself, Genji. Have you been sexually active?” 

 

“Here? Not yet.” He quipped back, sneering around the lollipop. She laughed softly at this, sweeping a lock of blonde hair back behind her ear. 

 

“You use condoms? Birth control?” Shifting in place, Genji felt a spike of self consciousness that he smoothed over with a reminder that the Miss Ziegler was just doing her job. Taking a deep breath and softly scratching at a spot on his arm, he answered. 

 

“Condoms, yeah. I’ve got an implant so… I don’t really use birth control. Never had a reason to.” Angela perked up at the mention of Genji’s implant, taking his arm gently and prodding around until she found it. It was just a small lump underneath the skin of his forearm, barely noticable if you weren’t actively looking for it. 

 

“How wonderfully discreet! Modern medicine is amazing, isn’t it? Thank you for answering truthfully.” Genji followed her with his eyes as she took a step back to write something down on a clipboard. When she returned her attention back to him she seemed to be thinking about something. 

 

“You know, I remember my first weeks here. Things haven’t changed much, really! Although they put an end to the whole running through the city naked thing pretty quickly. You should be glad.” Genji snorted softly, brow coming together. The nurse had been a student here too, huh? Go figure. The place seemed to keep things tight knit somehow. Angela smiled at him and smoothed his hair back away from his forehead, examining the bits of the rash that were creeping onto his face. 

 

“What did they make you eat? When I was here, they made us eat dove hearts. I nearly cried! Those poor birds...” 

 

“Rabbit kidney. They made us eat rabbit kidney.” Angela tutted under her breath and gently opened Genji’s mouth wide, reaching in to depress his tongue and look at the back his throat. She was just about the most thorough school nurse he’d ever had to deal with. Part of him wondered what she was doing in this place. 

 

“Super... Yes, yes, things really haven’t changed at all. Well Genji, from what I’m seeing you just have food poisoning. I can give you a cream for the rash but otherwise you just need to drink lots of fluids and try to stay away from anything that could upset your stomach.” Somehow the decree didn’t surprise him. Crunching the lollipop in his mouth into shards and chewing it away, he nodded. 

 

“Will it stay long?” He inquired, gesturing to the whole of his body. Angela stripped her gloves off, shaking her head. 

 

“No, not very. It should be gone within a couple of days if you keep up the cream, three times a day. Just be careful not to rub it into any open wounds or scabs. And Genji? No itching!” She passed him a nondescript tube with a white twist cap, smiling fondly as Genji opened it and sniffed it curiously. It smelled like old people. He gave her a look to which she laughed, waving him off. 

 

“I can’t help the smell! I’m not a miracle worker. Well, not always.” Angela winked at him good naturedly and started to go about her business as usual, allowing Genji to leave on his own. He sat there for some time more, gingerly applying the cream to any of the spots that he hadn’t clawed bloodied. He paid special attention to the spots on his face. 

 

When it finally felt no longer socially acceptable to stay in Nurse Ziegler’s company, Genji made his way back to his room. He felt… odd. He couldn’t pinpoint exactly what sensation it was but it was originating somewhere in his gut. He shoved it off as being related to his food poisoning. He’d just drink something that wasn’t booze and hopefully it’d go away. 

 

When Genji opened the door he was immediately met by Jesse stretched out on the futon, one leg thrown over the back of it and the other hanging off the front. He had one arm slung over his face, breathing low and steady. Genji noted that Jesse was wearing his crop top again and was thankful he hadn’t ran into any of the Elders on his way back from the nurse’s. He didn’t want to get caught not wearing dress code. 

 

Genji padded along, shoes removed at the front door, careful to not make too much noise. Jesse seemed to be out cold. Grabbing a bottle of water from the mini fridge, he sat on the floor and turned the TV on. Most of it was either news or stations that seemed to be just commercials. Giving in, Genji settled on a soap opera drama. 

 

Every so often, rather than actually paying any attention to the show, Genji would just… stare. Specifically at Jesse. Was that… him? That smelled like that? 

 

It was weird. Genji didn’t want to be weird about it. But he scooted a little closer, sniffing inquisitively. The scent was smokey and dark, heavy and unique in a way that Genji didn’t know how to name. It made his stomach flop with uncertainty. He swallowed wetly, brow furrowed. Maybe it was just his cologne. He moved away, shaking his head. God, was it a good thing Jesse was asleep. Since when was he such a creep?

 

Eventually Jesse woke up, stretching his long limbs awkwardly out from where he’d had them splayed. He grunted several times before Genji heard a loud pop. He swung around to look at Jesse, only to find the guy staring at him strangely. Licking his lips and bringing a hand up to cover where he knew part of the rash had spread to this face, Genji tried a smile. 

 

“Hey, what’s up?” 

 

“You look like fresh Hell.” Jesse replied tactfully. Immediately Genji scowled, dropping his hand. His shoulders arched up defensively as he turned away. He heard Jesse slip off the couch and before he knew it the man was sitting next to him. 

 

“Are you good? I couldn’t sleep last night, what with you moanin’ an groanin’ an floppin’ like a fish. Could hear you from my room.” Genji had to take a breath through his mouth. He had half the mind to tell Jesse that he needed to go easier on the cologne, that if he was trying to impress him it wasn’t going to work if he couldn’t breath. Something stopped him. 

 

“I’m fine. Just had an upset stomach.” It wasn’t a total lie, Genji reasoned. Jesse eyed him for a moment before conceding with a shrug and turning to the TV. After a moment, he scoffed. Genji cast him a glance. 

 

“What?” 

 

“M’aunt used to watch this shit religiously… You like these things?” Genji turned his attention back to the screen where two moderately attractive white people were having what was likely supposed to be a heated debate but seemed more like a mild disagreement. 

 

“Not really, no. There’s just nothing on. Trust me, I already checked.” Despite having obvious strong opinions on the quality of the entertainment, Jesse made no move to change the channel or get up and leave. Unthinkingly, Genji rubbed at his rash and watched with him. 

 

“That’s Meghan. With an ‘H’. She’s a bitch. She stole Kielyn’s kid; killed her husband an’ brother.” Genji’s brow furrowed as he examined the bitch that was Meghan with an ‘H’. He had a feeling Jesse’s aunt wasn’t the only one that had watched this stuff religiously. 

 

“Why’d she do that?” Jesse made a noise somewhere along the lines of ‘Dont get me started’ before promptly getting started. Genji listened despite not actually caring that much, more interested in how wound up Jesse seemed to be over the bizarre and convoluted plot line of the show than anything. By the time the episode ended, Genji felt slightly invested in finding out if Bitchy Meghan with an ‘H’ ever got what was coming to her. 

 

“Hey, ‘m starvin’. You up to eat? Kinda don’t feel like goin’ alone.” Jesse’s proposition caught Genji off guard. He mulled it over for a moment before shrugging. 

 

“Sure, why not? I’ll see if Lena and Emily want to come.” Genji caught the way Jesse frowned momentarily but brushed it off. If Jesse wanted to ask him on a lunch date he’d have to step up and actually do so. Until then, they did things as a group. Besides, he liked Lena and Emily’s company. Especially Lena. She was fun. 

 

They ended up someplace that smelled an awful lot like most places Genji had previously gone to when looking for food. It was overwhelming, making his brain short circuit as his stomach complained. He tried his best to sit through it, but it was ruining his appetite. 

 

Lena watched him pick at his salad half heartedly through the whole meal as she and Emily split a plate of fried cod and fries. Jesse had a burger and Genji couldn’t look away, mind thinking back to that damn rabbit kidney. His stomach twisted painfully in protest as he tried to sate the painful hunger blossoming from his gut with a forkful of lettuce. Eventually he gave up and just settled with guzzling down the lemonade he’d ordered. 

 

When everyone else had finished eating, idle chatter started up. Jesse was talking to Lena about scholarship grants-- Genji thus found out that Jesse had gotten a free ride through. He couldn’t help wondering the exact details but Lena congratulated him heartily on avoiding debtage. Emily helpfully chimed in that if they’d just gone back home they wouldn’t have had to worry about debt at all. 

 

“Yeah, but then we wouldn’a met these two lads, babe! Issa small price to pay for camaraderie, huh?” Genji snapped back to reality at this point, blinking as he realized he was staring directly at Jesse. They were sitting across from one another, so it’s not like it was hard. The problem was Jesse staring back. 

 

“I suppose you’ve got me there, love. Feels like this whole thing wouldn’t’ve been quite the same without getting doused in blood and watchin’ Genji struggle to not yak up on the front yard.” Jesse broke eye contact first, gaze flitting to Emily at her quip. Genji swallowed dryly and laughed along in an absent manner. He felt sick. He could smell Jesse’s cologne again, and something else now; it was making his head spin. 

 

“Genji? Genji? You all there?” Lena was waving a hand in front of his face but it still took him a second to respond. He startled slightly, sitting up straight and blinking belatedly. Lena frowned, one brow raised. 

 

“You a’ight? You’ve seemed sorta outta it all day.” Shaking his head, Genji grumbled out a reply. 

 

“I’m fine. Just a little sick. I’ll live, promise.” 

 

“Is not contagious, huh?” Emily inquired. Lena prodded her gently, giving her a look. She shrugged back. 

 

“No. It’s not.” Came Genji’s bland reply. A look of guilt overcame Emily’s face as she shifted in her seat. Jesse finally added in his two cents at this point. 

 

“Maybe ya should head back home, lay down for a bit…” Jesse’s idea sounded good. It sounded fantastic actually. And why wait until he got back to dorm? He could just… lay down right now. With a thud, Genji slumped over into this plate, effectively blacking out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's not a cop out, it's a literary trope! Anyways, here's Wonderwall. This is the longest chapter I think? I was originally going to cut it and put part of it in 8 but decided against it in the end to just make chapter 8 it's own thing. Stay tuned, and don't forget the kudos and comments


	8. Chapter Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's me, it's me, it's me. Underneath it all, it's still me.

The room he was in was unfamiliar. It wasn’t the nurse’s office, and it wasn’t a hospital. That was what he could tell past the blurry quality of his vision. Taking a short breath he was hit with the strong smell of blood and bleach. Underneath it was something else, something that smelled vaguely familiar but he couldn’t put a name to it. Slowly, with a great measure of will power, Genji sat himself up. A bag of ice fell into his lap as he did so. 

 

“Genji?” With a grim sense of realization, Genji was made aware of just where he was. Hanzo opened the door of the room, coming in with a glass of water. Taking the bag of ice off his lap and moving it aside, Genji turned in the bed to watch Hanzo carefully. 

 

“How’d I…?” Hanzo sat on the bed by him, handing him the glass of water. He took it without question and sipped. The water didn’t seem to help quell the chasm that was currently sitting in his stomach. Fuck, he’d never felt so god damn hungry in his life. 

 

“Lena called. I came and picked you up.” Puffing air into his bangs to get them out of his eyes, Genji regarded his water intently. Why not call his mom or dad? Although, it was nice that Hanzo actually cared enough to come get him. To answer the phone at all. Genji jumped at suddenly being touched, flinching away. Hanzo frowned before instigating again, pushing Genji’s hair back away from his forehead. 

 

“How are you feeling?” The question made Genji’s pulse spike. How did he think he was feeling? 

 

“I feel like shit. Thanks for nothing, asshole.” The venom in Genji’s tone didn’t go unnoticed but somehow Hanzo merely tsk’d him. The indifference to his feelings only seemed to fan the flames and he shoved the glass of water back into his hands, pulling away. 

 

“Don’t be like this, Genji. It had to be done. Do you even know how you were making yourself look? How you made me look?” That felt like the most words Hanzo had uttered to him in years and it was just to make him feel like shit for wanting boundaries. 

 

“Do you really think I care? Because I really fucking don’t. I’m sick because of that stupid ritual. You could have warned me-- fuck, you could have actually been a good brother and stood up for me!” Genji turned on Hanzo now, mouth pulled into a snarl and brown eyes sharp as stone. Hanzo stiffened under his stare and didn’t speak for a long moment. 

 

“You don’t understand yet… You will though. Just give it time. Please, Genji, don’t be like this... I don’t want to fight with you anymore...” Genji watched as Hanzo ran a hand over his face, seeming to deflate. He sounded tired, desperate, and frankly a little heart broken. Genji’s throat tightened and he struggled to swallow the spit pooling in his mouth. 

 

“I don’t want to fight anymore either…” His voice sounded strange in his ears. The smell of bleach and blood was even stronger now and Genji couldn’t shake the feeling it was coming from Hanzo. In the moment his thoughts were elsewhere. Hanzo came closer and before Genji could question what he was doing, he was being hugged. 

 

It was warm. Unusually warm. Or maybe Genji was just cold. He couldn’t tell. Hanzo was hugging him, that he knew. He was hugging him tight enough to hurt, nails digging into his skin and face pressed into his shoulder. Genji slowly slid his arms around his brother in turn. This close he could smell past the bleach and blood-- He smelled like home. 

 

“I’m sorry, Genji… But things are going to be different now. I’m not going to leave you again, I promise.” The feeling that something was off lingered; Genji couldn’t bring himself to care, tears pushing their way out and rolling down his face into the shoulder of Hanzo’s shirt. This was all happening too quickly. He still felt bitter, he still felt angry-- but how the Hell was he supposed to turn Hanzo away? How was he supposed to do that now? 

 

“Okay…” He finally said, unable to hold the waver out of his voice as he cried. Hanzo’s breath was hot against his skin and for a moment Genji wondered why he could feel it so acutely. Then Hanzo pulled away. 

 

“Do you smoke?” Genji rushed to wipe his face off, embarrassed at having his brother see him cry. It had been years since he’d felt comfortable enough to do so, and he wasn’t quite ready yet. Hanzo let him take his time, getting up and going to rummage in a drawer of his dresser. He produced a blunt and a lighter and came back to sit next to Genji on the bed, lighting up hastily and taking a drag. 

 

“So… When did you start doing that?” Genji tried, finding that his voice was steadying. Hanzo slowly exhaled, smoke curling off his lips. He passed the blunt to Genji casually before rubbing a hand over the back of his neck. 

 

“About the time I got here. One of the parties in the first two weeks… Helps take the edge off.” 

 

“No shit…” Genji said, taking a pull and holding it. After a moment he let it go, passing it back to Hanzo. “I’m surprised it took you so long to realize.” Hanzo clucked his tongue at Genji, shaking his head. 

 

“You weren’t the one with mom and dad breathing down your neck.” Genji shrugged half heartedly, unable to argue that point in particular. He scooted a little closer, pressing his shoulder to Hanzo’s. For once in who knew how many years, the two brothers sat in a comfortable silence. Slowly, with each drag, the hunger in Genji’s stomach edged away slightly. It didn’t make sense, but he wasn’t about to argue. If it helped, it helped. He wasn’t going to look the gift horse in the mouth. 

 

“... Is my name really Han-zero in your phone?” Hanzo suddenly asked. Genji looked up and laughed abruptly, covering his mouth. 

 

“Who… who told you that?” Hanzo shrugged. 

 

“Lena.” 

 

“That snitch!” Hanzo looked to him with soft smile, brow up in an open expression. 

 

“So it’s true? That’s childish. I know you can do better than that.” Genji couldn’t help giggling at this, pausing to take another sip of water from the glass that Hanzo had given back to him now that things had settled down. An idea occurred to him. 

 

“What’s my name in your phone?” Hanzo looked surprised at the question. 

 

“What?” 

 

“Come on, what is it!” Hanzo shook his head at this, seeming embarrassed. 

 

“It’s just Genji.” This disappointed Genji greatly. There was no way it was just Genji. There had to be an emoji, at least an emoji. With a whine, he pawed a hand at Hanzo’s arm. The man swat him away, huffing loudly in what Genji recognized as a restrained laugh. 

 

“Let me see! Let me see, if you’re telling the truth then- then you’ll let me see.” Hanzo gave a sharp ‘fine’ and dug his phone out of his pocket. He unlocked it with a series of swipes that Genji couldn’t bother to memorize and tossed him the phone. Genji caught it and quickly made his way to contacts. There wasn’t many people in there, which somehow surprised Genji. He figured New Hanzo would have more friends. 

 

But there he was, in the G’s. As… Genji. With a small frown, Genji clicked on his name to see his contact info. The picture was verifiably ancient. Back when his hair had stayed black and was never styled properly. He was grinning proudly in the picture, but Genji couldn’t tell when it was taken. 

 

“Wow, you weren’t joking. That’s so boring!” Genji threw the phone back, watching Hanzo catch is easily. The device was clicked off as Hanzo shrugged. After a moment, Genji got an idea. 

 

“Wait, wait. Take a new picture of me. The one you have is, is just… Blah. I look like I was twelve or something.” Genji ignored the fact it was because he probably was. Hanzo arched an eyebrow and turned his phone back on. He raised it, ready to take a random picture of Genji. 

 

“No, no, no! No! Have you no sense? Gimme that.” Genji snatched the phone away and got up, stumbling a bit out of the bed as he tripped on something that looked an awfully lot like fishnets. He ignored it for now; he made his way to the bathroom. 

 

Hanzo followed curiously, watching Genji quickly brush his hair. Genji snapped three selfies before choosing the one he liked the most and setting it as his new contact picture. Hanzo examined it before smiling. 

 

“Thanks. It looks good.” Genji shrugged nonchalantly at the compliment. He’d had plenty of practice taking selfies. He couldn’t help wondering if Hanzo didn’t take many, what with how he had been ready to take a picture of Genji himself. 

“I need a new one for you too, you know.” Genji finally said. Hanzo squinted at him before nodding and opening his hand for Genji’s phone. He watched his brother preen for a moment in the mirror, finally noticing the undercut his brother was sporting. How he’d not seen it before was beyond him. 

 

Hanzo’s picture was simple, only the slightest glimpse of a smile on his lips. But it was fitting. It was… Hanzo. Despite the piercings, the haircut, the drugs and alcohol, the metal. It was Hanzo. The thought brought Genji peace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters, one day? You betcha. Consider it a calm before the storm. And yes, I'm aware that weed does usually make people crave food but there's a reason. There's always a reason.


	9. Chapter Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jesse was a good guy. Genji, maybe not so much.

Spur of the moment decisions had always been Genji’s forte. Thing was, he usually knew why he did the things he did. Greed, lust, boredom-- all valid reasons for bad decisions he made. What he couldn’t fathom was why he had stolen that stupid patty. 

 

It sounded dramatic, but Genji had spent a total of three minutes in the line of the cafeteria staring at the tub of meat. Just, staring. His mouth had felt dry the whole time as he peered around trying to see if anybody was watching him. Then he reached in, past the set of tongs, and grabbed one greasy, soggy patty with his bare hands and shoved it into the pocket of his hoodie. 

 

If anyone saw, they didn’t say shit. The growing grease stain coming from his pocket was the only outward sign at his deed. Genji quickly caught up with Jesse at the checkout line, face a mask of neutrality that could only hint to something being hidden. 

 

The lunch lady was smarter than the average bear and saw right through him. She demanded to see all his items so she could ring them up. After some less than gentle coaxing and Jesse giving him a strange look, Genji fished the patty out of his pocket and held it up in shame. After paying he quickly discarded of both the pattie and the sad excuse of a salad he’d also purchased. He watched Jesse eat in silence, gaze far away. 

 

“Do you not have enough money?” Jesse had asked, seemingly less concerned with Genji’s sudden change in diet and more so if his friend was in any financial issue. He didn’t get an answer. Somehow this didn’t seem to bother him. 

 

Genji quickly decided upon Jesse coercing him into the passenger seat of his two door Oldsmobile that the man must’ve been some kind of saint. 

 

The ride to their destination was quiet, filled with Jesse singing softly in a slightly off-key manner to songs Genji didn’t recognize. He sat prone in his seat, watching the midnight world zip past his window. Jesse’s cologne--which Genji was no longer quite sure was cologne--was suffocating him in all the worst ways possible. The coil in his stomach was hard to identify at this point. Occasionally Genji would glance at Jesse to find the man glancing back. 

 

“My treat.” The banged up rest stop was well out of the way, guaranteeing the kind of privacy Genji needed for what he was about to do. He picked out the things he wanted and Jesse forked over wads of cash without question. The two of them retreated back outside to seat themselves on the trunk of Jesse’s car. 

 

Genji couldn’t hold back the moans that bubbled out of him as he sunk his teeth into the lukewarm rest stop burger. For a moment the shame he felt was pushed away as he, first slowly and then quickly, ate his way through the food provided for him. The second burger was dissected, the bun and toppings cast aside as Genji all but scarfed down the meat itself. Then the hot dog was given the same treatment. 

 

“I don’t know what’s goin’ on with you, but… You know, you can talk to me if ya need’a.” Jesse’s voice startled Genji slightly. He’d been half way through slowly gnawing on a piece of jerky the side of his hand, completely oblivious to Jesse watching him. Once more the shame of it all overcame him, swamping him. 

 

“I’m fine. Just… trying new things.” Genji wiped the back of his hand across his mouth, trying vainly to wipe the grease off. Jesse’s gaze was dark in the night and near impossible to read. Genji swallowed tightly, unsure of what to say all of a sudden. Instead of pressing further, Jesse reached out and swiped a thumb over Genji’s cheek. 

 

“Ya had a lil somethin’ there. Sorry.” Laughter slowly bubbled up from Genji’s chest, first coming in sporadic giggles and then in one loud continuous fit. Jesse seemed alarmed at first before slowly smiling and laughing along. The two of them sat there laughing at nothing for what felt like forever, until Genji’s sides started to hurt.

 

“Thanks for doing this, Jesse.” Genji finally managed to get out, tears at the corners of his eyes. Jesse ran a hand through his hair, suddenly seeming bashful, and murmured something about it being no big deal. Against better judgement, Genji scooted a little closer and leaned onto Jesse slightly. Now that the gnawing pain in his stomach had been quieted, Jesse didn’t smell quite so overwhelming; in the open air even less so. 

 

It was then that Genji’s phone buzzed, ruining the pristine moment. Both men jumped slightly, pulling away from one another. Genji groaned inwardly at this. Fishing his phone out of his pocket, he stared at the screen. 

 

It was Hanzo. 

 

The text was simple. ‘Where are you?’ Genji looked between the phone and Jesse, brow pulling down. Jesse caught on quickly, mouth hardening. 

 

“What is it? Somethin’ wrong?” Shaking his head, Genji waved Jesse off. 

 

“No, it’s just my brother...” After a pause, Genji turned away slightly to answer. ‘Out’. He then quickly tacked on another message. ‘With friends.’ Not waiting for a reply, Genji silenced his phone and shoved it back into his pocket. Taking a vicious bite out of the beef jerky he had left, he resigned to put his head on Jesse’s shoulder. 

 

It probably wasn’t fair of Genji to act like this. Jesse was just trying to be a good person, and Hanzo was just trying to be a good brother. He couldn’t bring himself to care though. He just wanted to be left alone in this moment for a little while longer, while his stomach wasn’t eating itself and he could indulge in a little tender contact. 

 

The stars winked overhead, knowing already the outcome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's nothing really happening between them, not yet, but isn't it sweet to see them together? hahhghddfhsl 83c
> 
> Anyways, I came up with this chapter after a little brain boiling and staying up until my eyes wanted to pop out of my face. Hope it's enjoyable and doesn't flow like the molasses it feels like. Chapter 10 soon! 
> 
> If anyone was wondering why the story is flowing so slowly it's primarily due to the movie this is based off of being a psychological horror. The climax builds at a snails pace but it sure feels good once it hits, huh? Also, I used to have hideously long chapters, like 35k for one. It took months to update. Arent we glad we get shorter chapters and less wait time?


	10. Chapter Ten

It hurt, it hurt, it hurt. 

 

Genji woke with a start, pain blossoming from his stomach and dragging a strained whine out of him. He was sweating something fierce, skin sticky and hair plastered to his face and the back of his neck. Hands clawing at his abdomen, he rolled over and choked back a sob. 

 

Past the pain, there was one thought. Food. He needed to eat, eat something, he didn’t know what, anything maybe. With only desperation to guide him in the dark, Genji dragged himself off his bed. It took a while to manage to sit himself up enough to open the door, but once he did he continued his quest. 

 

Jesse and him had left the TV on. More appropriately, Jesse had left it on. He was sleeping on the futon, mouth slacked slightly as he snored softly in the encroaching dawn. Genji didn’t pay him much mind, pulling himself across the floor with fervor towards the mini fridge. 

 

On their way back from the rest stop, Jesse had stopped to pick up ingredients for food. Said he was going to treat Genji to a decent meal. That was the man’s objective now as he weakly tugged on the fridge door. It opened, cool air spilling out onto Genji’s overheated face. His stomach audibly growled. 

 

There it was, salvation! Mind numbed, Genji snatched the package of raw chicken from the shelf and tore it open with no hesitation. Before any rational thought could interrupt him to reality, he sunk his teeth into it and groaned. It took a couple of tugs to tear a chunk off, Genji shaking his head to and fro as he struggled with it. He had managed to swallow it nearly whole before diving in for another chunk, breathing heavy. 

 

“Genji?” 

 

He stilled. He stopped breathing even. Genji had a mouth full of raw chicken and was stooped over like a gargoyle in front of the mini fridge, the light from the TV illuminating him from behind. Voice weak, he made a noise of acknowledgement. Jesse shifted slowly, joints popping as he sleepily stretched. 

 

“What are you doing? It’s just ‘bout four in the mornin’...” Genji let the meat fall from his mouth, staring straight forward. If he turned around he couldn’t promise he wouldn’t lose his fucking mind. Jesse’s voice was thick with sleep, scratchy with lack of water. But most of all, he sounded concerned. 

 

“Couldn’t sleep. Thirsty.” There was a long pause and Genji braced himself for the worst. If Jesse saw what the fuck he was doing right now, the guy would be moved out before the sun even came up fully. That wouldn’t have normally bothered Genji, but the particular semantics of the situation were not quite ideal. Finally, Jesse spoke again. 

 

“Mm… A’ight. Care to pass me a bottle?” Slowly, Genji put the chicken down and wiped his slimy hand on his shorts. He felt around for a water bottle, taking it out and tossing it over his shoulder blindly. Jesse cursed softly, a thump sounding from somewhere that was certainly nowhere near the futon. 

 

“Nice toss…” The sarcasm was faint but he didn’t sound necessarily upset. The futon creaked when Jesse flopped back onto it. In the silence Genji could fucking hear him drinking, practically see the way his neck was moving as he tipped his head back. He squeezed his eyes shut, willing the images away as he took a deep slow breath. 

 

“Try an’ get some sleep… If ya need anythin, ‘m goin’ back to bed.” 

 

“Got it. Thanks.” Genji needed Jesse to shut up and sleep already. After a long moment of silence, Jesse’s breathing evened out. Not waiting a second longer, Genji dove back into his meal. Before he knew it, it was gone. 

 

He sat there for some time in the dark, laying on the floor next to the open fridge. Something was wrong. Something was terribly, horribly wrong. Tears pricked at the back of Genji’s eyelids as he tried to console himself that somehow this was just some sort of freakishly long and specific nightmare, that he was going to wake up and be fine and go eat a salad wrap or something. 

 

Dawn eventually broke, the fridge closed and all evidence of Genji’s early morning snacking gone. The man in question was back in his room, on his side in bed. He wasn’t asleep. He probably couldn’t have slept short of being knocked unconscious. Instead he stared at the wall and indulged in the blissful emptiness of his own mind in the moment. His problems could wait, he had decided. They could wait until he decided they needed to be taken care of. For now he just wanted to make it through the Trials. If he could just make it through the next week he’d be golden. 

 

His phone buzzed. 

 

‘How are you feeling? Not hungover are you?’ Genji stared at the screen of his phone. Hanzo must have assumed that he had been out partying last night. 

 

‘Feel fine.’ He messaged back. He was thankful that the years had made it harder for Hanzo to read him as easily as he used to. Otherwise, he would have seen through all of this much sooner. 

 

‘Come over later. We need to talk.’ Something about this wasn’t what it seemed, he swore on it. The years had also made Genji incompetent in reading his brother. Throwing his phone aside, Genji rolled over and covered his head with his pillow, willing the sun to go in reverse. He wasn’t ready to face what today had to offer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are things finally picking up? Maybe they are. I mean, I hope they are. This is all played out in my head a hundred times over as I try to get it down in proper words, so the suspense or unease is lost on me! Tell me your thoughts and it'll help me know if I'm doing something right or wrong.


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The truth comes out, and it's far stranger than any fiction.

Genji met with Hanzo sometime after the Rookies had been lined up and flogged with rulers. It had been a genuinely unpleasant experience that left many of them with blistering, red welts hidden under their clothes or lack thereof. Genji had been lucky that the Elder beating him was a chump and pulled their punches. 

 

The brothers sat in Hanzo’s room together for some time in a strange silence that made Genji nervous considering Hanzo had summoned him here to talk. That and Genji was still trying to come to terms with the reality of what he had done that morning. If he could talk to anyone about the bat shit things he was doing it should be his brother. 

 

Eventually Hanzo spoke to him. 

 

“You and your roommate seem close. It’s nice that you’re getting along.” The topic was normal. Benign. Genji laughed despite himself at how out of place it felt. 

 

“Yeah, I guess. I didn’t want a roommate to begin with but I guess he’s not the worst one I could get stuck with.” If he’d been stuck with anyone else, Genji was sure he’d be doing much worse. Who knew you could become so attached to someone in a week? 

 

“Mm.” Hanzo was staring, again. He seemed anxious about something, the kind of anxious you get when you’re excited about something but don’t know if you should go through with it. He kept shifting in place and it was driving both Genji and Umi absolutely nuts. 

 

“You said you wanted to talk about something… Right?...” Genji finally said. Hanzo inhaled sharply, lips curling back over his teeth in a strange grimace. The expression was brief but Genji had caught it. 

 

“Yes… Yes… I do. Genji, how have you been feeling? Really? Don’t lie to me.” It was a command. A shiver raced its way down Genji’s spine as he took in the scene before him. Hanzo was excited, but about what? About Genji being sick? About him making it through the first week? He couldn’t tell. 

 

“I…“ Hanzo’s fingers drummed against his thigh as he waited for Genji to answer him, gaze intense. His jaw was clenched tight enough to make the muscles in his neck stand out. Genji stared at those rather than maintain eye contact any longer. “I think there’s something wrong with me.” 

 

It was as close to the truth as Genji could get, voice small. He swallowed tightly and gripped his own knees firmly. Hanzo scooted closer. His voice was low, gutteral, as he leaned in. Genji couldn’t stop from raising his eyes back up. 

 

“It happened, didn’t it. To you too. After you ate it.” The tears sprang out of Genji before he could even fully come to terms with what Hanzo had said to him. The stress of the past few days manifested in a sob as his expression crumpled. Hanzo’s eyes glittered wickedly, his mouth pulled taunt. 

 

“Why? Why? What’s happening to me?” Panic and fear and anger and helplessness-- they were all welling up and spilling over as Genji practically wailed at Hanzo, grimacing widely. His brother neglected to answer, instead coolly watching Genji weep. 

 

“Have you eaten?” Genji heard the question but couldn’t compose himself to answer it, face bowed down as he slowly curled over himself. The hand that fisted itself in his hair was a rude awakening, pulling his head back and forcing his neck to crane. Hanzo hissed at him under his breath, anger passing over his face before his grip on Genji’s hair slackened and he pet his head gently. 

“Have you eaten?” He repeated, voice soft. Genji muffled a sob as he nodded slowly. He needed to pull himself together. He didn’t know how he was going to manage it but he had to do so and quickly. Umi found her way to Genj’s lap, gently nosing his face and licking his cheeks. He let her, wrapping his arms around her and carding his fingers into her fur. She was doing a better job at comforting him than Hanzo was. 

“What did you eat?” As the panic and fear subsided slowly, the anger overtook him. Genji’s grip on Umi tightened and she let out a yelp of pain, surprising him as he let go of her and she skittered away. Hanzo tensed. 

 

“You, you knew. You knew if I ate it, that, that this would happen. And you made me eat it anyways.” 

 

“No--” Genji struck Hanzo before he could finish his thought. Hanzo sat there looking quite startled before striking Genji back. It fucking hurt, more than Genji had been expecting it to. Maybe he hadn’t been expecting Hanzo to hit him back at all. 

 

“I didn’t know.” Hanzo started, tone dangerous. “I didn’t know. I needed to know, I needed to know I wasn’t the only one.” He pushed Genji now, getting up to pace. Genji watched him from where he sat, too stunned to continue shedding tears. Hanzo ran a hand through his hair and grunted in frustration. 

 

“Do you, do you have any idea... how hard it was? Dealing with this- Alone? I couldn’t talk to anyone about this, this-- Not dad, not mom, and definitely not you!” Hanzo stopped short, turning on Genji. His expression was cold. Genji’s mouth moved but he couldn’t seem to produce any noise. 

 

“Now tell me. What did you eat.” Taking a strained breath, Genji let his eyes flutter closed as he slowly composed himself. It was obvious he wasn’t going to get anywhere with hysterics, especially when Hanzo wouldn’t even indulge him in the simplest of comfort. 

 

“Chicken. Raw chicken.” He felt hollow. This was really happening. He opened his eyes again, watching Hanzo carefully. The expression his brother was currently wearing was dark and Genji found he didn’t like that one bit. 

 

“That won’t work forever, you know.” He warned. Genji’s heart dropped to his feet along with his stomach and any shred of hope he didn’t even realize he was holding onto. Voice broken and only half there, he asked a question he knew was going to doom him. 

 

“What do you mean?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three chapters in what is technically a 24 hour time period. Wild.


	12. Chapter Twelve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Genji didn't know what he needed. Maybe a fucking break would be nice.
> 
>  
> 
> Warning for semi-explicit cannibalism and car accidents.

“Where are we going?” It was perhaps the third time Genji had asked in the last ten minutes and Hanzo looked like he was going to rip the wheel off the dashboard of the car. 

 

“I already told you. You’ll see when we get there.” Genji stared out the window. The scenery was familiar but in the new lighting, with the new circumstances, it felt like a whole different world. He struggled to swallow, stomach tight with apprehension. He hugged himself and waited. 

 

Hanzo quite suddenly veered off the road, eliciting a shrill noise of fear and surprise from Genji as he went through the grass and slammed on the brakes. Genji was very glad he’d actually bothered to put on his seat belt this time. Taking a deep gulp of air, he glared at Hanzo. The man didn’t seem bothered, already clamoring out of the car. Despite his anger, Genji followed. 

 

The two were crouched along the side of the road, the rise of the land allowing them some obscurity as they watched the mostly empty street. 

 

“Why are we here?”

 

“You’ll see.” 

 

“Hanzo!” Genji had just about had it up to here with Hanzo ignoring and dismissing his questions. His brother continued to watch the street although Genji could see his face twisting slowly with emotions he couldn’t seem to suppress in the moment. 

 

“Genji, can you just, be quiet for one second. For once, in your life, can you just trust me?” 

 

“That’s rich, coming from you! You did this to me and you expect me to up and fucking trust you? For all I know you’re going to push me into the street and--” 

 

“Shut up! Just, shut up!” Hanzo’s fingers were curled tightly into the asphalt of the road, mouth pulled back into a wide snarl. His eyes were wide, pupils dilated. The sound of a car approaching was lost to Genji. 

 

“No! You shut up! I’m not going to let you off the hook! You ruined my fucking life with this! How can you just expect me to--”

 

“Stay here.” It happened too quickly for Genji to really parse what Hanzo was doing, shoving him backwards as he launched into the street and ran wildly in front of the car. There was the squeal of tires, the thud of something being hit, and then the sound of metal bending in on itself. Genji remembered yelling, but he didn’t know at what. 

 

Scrabbling his way back up the side of the road, Genji caught sight of Hanzo laying on his side in the middle of the street, hair a pool of ink around his head. Genji felt his heart drop to his gut. On hands and knees he crawled desperately over to his brother, tears already threatening to pour out. 

 

“H… Hanzo… Hanzo?” Genji prodded him gently. He didn’t see any blood, but he’d never actually seen anyone get hit by a car before. Didn’t know what to look for to know if he was okay or not. The blare of a car horn was a constant in the background, smoke rising from the crushed in front end. It had hit a tree. 

 

Right when Genji was going to start flipping shit over his brother killing himself in front of him, Hanzo’s eyes snapped open. He sat up, causing Genji to inhale sharply and move backwards. He looked over, immediately zeroing in on the car that had crashed. That he had crashed. Hanzo got up easily, seeming to not even be injured. He hadn’t even been scraped up after hitting the road. Genji watched him carefully. 

 

“Come.” He ordered. With a lack of knowing what else to do, Genji obeyed. 

 

The two made their way to the car, Hanzo yanking open the door with ease. Genji peered in at the occupants. Two woman. One of them was slumped head first into the wheel, blood leaking from where her head had hit. The other was prone in her seat, face unidentifiable from where she had slammed into the dashboard. The air bags hadn’t gone off, evidently. 

 

Hanzo pushed the woman on the wheel back, silencing the blare of the horn. Genji shivered against his will, taking a step back. 

 

“Hanzo…” He just looked at him. Then slowly clamored into the car and seated himself in the lap of the woman who had been driving. Genji watched in what he was pretty sure was horror as Hanzo gently took her face in his hands and examined her injury. 

 

He pressed his lips first to the wound, tongue coming out to lap at the blood. Genji watched him just lick the wound for what felt like forever. His own voice failed him and he felt like he was rooted to the spot, forced to watch this. He swooned slightly when Hanzo opened his mouth wider to close his teeth around the split skin and pull. 

 

“St- Stop! Stop it! Stop it, stop it, stop it!” Genji found his voice the second his stomach decided to growl at the sight of his brother fucking eating a woman. Hanzo succeeded in peeling a large patch of skin clean off the woman’s face at that moment, twisting to look at Genji as he slowly pulled it into his mouth and chewed. 

 

“Good fucking God.” The smell was setting in. The smell that Genji knew was supposed to be repulsive-- of blood and death. He should be sickened, and in some way he was. But god it smelled so fucking good. Clutching his stomach and fighting back hysteria, Genji took a shaky step backwards. 

 

“The other one is yours.” Was all Hanzo offered. Genji’s gaze flickered to the other woman. She looked like she was around his age. He choked slightly, bile rising to the back of his throat. He made his way over to her hesitantly. He leaned in closely and listened. 

 

“She- She’s still, she’s still breathing. Hanzo, we have to, have to call--”

 

“No.” Genji flinched away and watched as Hanzo leaned over, grabbing the disfigured woman’s head and jerking it. The crack made Genji’s toes curl. Hanzo had just snapped her neck. The two brothers stared at one another for what felt like an eternity, Genji in disbelief and Hanzo with an unreadable expression. The latter slowly turned back to his meal, leaning in to secure the woman’s cheek in his teeth and tugging the flesh away. 

 

“I can’t, I can’t do this.” There was blood all over Hanzo’s face, dripping down his chin and onto his clothes. Some disgusting part of him wanted to lick it off, saddle up into the lap of one of these poor women and-- He couldn’t finish the thought. 

 

“You need to. You have to. Genji--” 

 

“No, no, no, no, I have to- I have to go. I have to go.” Before anything could stop him, Genji turned and took off sprinting back up the road. He just kept running, past the burn in his legs and the fire in his lungs and the pain in his stomach and the worse pain in his heart. Until the university was back in sight and even then he kept running. Up the steps, through the door, past people who tried to say hello. Genji didn’t stop running until he got to his room and nearly slammed into Jesse. 

 

“Whoa, holy shit-- Who set your pants on fire, pal?” Genji gripped tightly to Jesse’s shirt, eyes kept down. The man’s hands came to his shoulders, gently peeling him off of his chest and making him take a step back. 

 

“I thought you were out with… Genji? Hey, are y’alright?” Taking a ragged breath, the burn in his lungs not quite subsided, Genji finally raised his gaze up to Jesse’s and felt the urge to cry return. 

 

“I, I…” With his voice faltering and thick, Genji just closed his mouth and swallowed. 

 

“Come on- Sit down somewhere, ya look like you’re gonna right pass out.” Wherever Jesse had been planning to go had been put on hold and the part of Genji that wasn’t having a crisis felt both spoiled and slightly guilty. 

 

“Did you want me to, uh, call Lena? Or summin’?” Jesse had seated Genji on the futon and given him his blanket. Genji felt like it was some kind of curse. The thing reeked of Jesse and it was making his stomach do flips in his abdomen. The small gesture should have been comforting but all it was doing was driving Genji to an early grave. 

 

“No. No... Don’t, please.” Jesse lowered himself onto the floor in front of Genji, face furrowed up with concern as he grinded his teeth. Genji wanted to tell him to stop, that it was a bad habit, but he just stared back. 

“What’dya need? I don’t know how to... Help ya, if you don’t tell me.” Fuck Jesse. Fuck him for being so nice to him. He had no idea what he was getting into. Genji wanted to keep it that way. For his sake, and Jesse’s.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And thus we finally get to the tag everyone was waiting for! Cannibalism! Aren't we happy it finally is here? Nothing quite as nice as eating people, huh?


	13. Chapter Thirteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are always causalities in conflict. Even those that are internal.

Genji had deigned to spend the remained of the day holed up in his room, away from the world, until he could sort out what his next course of action was. Hanzo had been very clear that Genji couldn’t get away with eating just regular animal meats, even raw. Genji was sure he could manage though. He was sure. 

 

At least he was until Jesse. 

 

It stood to be reiterated that Genji was and always had been more interested in Jesse’s body from the start. He was good looking, sue him. He had nice broad shoulders and thick thighs and an unconventionally handsome face. It was bold faced to assume Genji hadn’t looked at him sexually at least once since meeting him. Twas in his nature. 

 

As things stood, there was a sudden spark of interest that wasn’t entirely sexual but was wholly unplatonic. And Genji was fucking struggling with it. He blamed it on seeing what Hanzo claimed to be his future. Of eating, eating others. Genji tried to tell himself it was one thing to eat corpses but a totally different thing to craving living beings. In the end he laughed at himself because this was all so god damn fucked up. 

 

None of this helped to stop the mixed coil in his gut, something a whole lot like lust and a little too much like hunger twining inside him whenever he stared too long at his roommate. Jesse didn’t seem any wiser to this, instead only slightly bashful at the sudden attention Genji was giving him. When Jesse started to stare back that was when the real trouble started. 

 

Lena picked up on the changes first, smiling cheekily as she wagged her eyebrows at Genji and winked. Emily was exasperated with her girlfriend for being so nonchalant about teasing the two of them but was just as intently interested in the two men’s sudden more-than-friends affiliation with one another. 

 

Normally Genji would have thrown caution to the wind and jumped in head first, consequences be damned. If things ended messy his money or his charm could usually get him out of trouble. If not, he’d just deal with it as it happened. That wasn’t going to work. Genji was finding out a lot of things weren’t going to work anymore. 

 

He was afraid, though. He was fucking terrified. Not only at the thought of hurting another human being but maybe more so at hurting Jesse. He didn’t want that, not for him or anyone. Anytime he let his mind wander too far down the familiar path of fantasy he’d get blindsided by intrusive thoughts. He couldn’t even wet dream properly without thinking about sinking his teeth into Jesse’s neck, where his pulse was the strongest and-- 

 

It was becoming a real problem. And fast. 

 

Genji had been hoping that the mandatory party call from the Elders would help him take his mind off of the shit that was happening to him. Nothing like drinking your worries away and smoking until you don’t remember your own name. If there was anything harder, Genji would indulge for the night. What did he have to lose after all? Then they’d thrown a bucket of yellow paint over him and shoved him in a closet with a trembling waif of a woman. 

 

This was not the kind of party he had wanted. 

 

“Don’t come out until you’ve made green!” Came Ana’s voice from the other side of the closet door. The girl, someone Genji vaguely remembered from one of his classes, stared up at him with big brown eyes and a trembling lip. She murmured something in French, rubbing her blue slicked arms as she looked away from Genji. 

 

“We don’t… have to do this.” Genji managed to choke out. She smelled, really nice. Of course there was her perfume, past the heavy stench of the acrylics, but also something deeper underneath both. She looked up at him again before toughening her trembling exterior and shaking her head. 

 

“No, it is fine. Just… Do not go too fast?” She put her hands on Genji’s chest, rubbing her palms over his collarbone and past his shoulders. He swallowed thickly. She was leaning in and he couldn’t take his eyes off her lips. They were full and pouty. He leaned back slightly, putting his hands on her waist despite himself. 

 

“I am sorry… Please, I do not want to be in trouble…” Genji didn’t even know what the punishment was. He wasn’t sure if he actually wanted to find out, but he also desperately wanted out of this closet. The woman’s lips finally found his face, pressing gently against his cheek in a chaste gesture. 

 

“I am Amelie. If it helps.” It didn’t. It didn’t at all. It just made it harder. Hands tightening their grip on her waist, Genji took a deep shuddering breath. Before he could manage to wring anymore self control out of himself, his patience broke and he surged forward onto Amelie. She made a noise of surprise, trying to find where to put her hands as Genji wordlessly rut against her. 

 

With her pinned against the wall like this, even in such a cramped space, made Genji feel some form of guilt and shame. This whole thing felt wrong. One of her hands came down to cup him through his pants, mouth forming an ‘O’ against Genji’s when she didn’t find what she had likely been expecting. She tapped his shoulder gently before pushing him with a little more force. 

 

“What, what should I do? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable...” Genji shook his head, swallowing tightly. Amelie’s face downcast with guilt for a moment before she resolved herself. She moved her hands back up to his torso instead. 

 

Thought dissolved as Genji tried to let go, tried to desperately just lose himself away from what he was doing. Eventually he was brought back to reality when Amelie cried out in what was definitely pain.

 

Reeling backwards, the first thing Genji registered was the taste on his tongue. Then he saw the blood, Amelie’s hands cupping her mouth as tears streamed down her face and made small tracks through the paint. She pushed past him, grappling with the door. It opened quickly, revealing a very concerned looking Gabriel who’s eyes widened when he saw the blood coming from Amelie’s mouth. 

 

“What the-- What happened?” Another man stood up, rushing to Amelie’s side. From the way she threw herself into him he was either a brother or a boyfriend. More guilt on Genji’s plate.

 

“He- He bit me!” Genji’s blood ran cold and despite himself he slowly licked the blood off of his lips. Gabriel’s stare was hard and sharp as stone as he pulled Genji out by his shirt. Before he knew it he’d been kicked out of the party altogether. 

 

Maybe it was a mercy; Genji really didn’t feel like trying to explain himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With things happening, things happen. If you were to have watched the movie that this is based off of, you'd find this fanfic is kinda all over the place rather than following linearly the plot of the movie. I felt that was just better. Also, with how the characters differ from their movie counterparts, it's sorta hard to help. None the less. 
> 
> Also, Amelie! I love her... I mean, I love Widow too (for different reasons) but Amelie! Also yes the man comforting her is Gerard.


	14. Chapter Fourteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lull in the animosity, something tender buds among the thorns.

“So, ya into some freaky stuff, huh?” Genji looked up over his steak. He’d ordered it as bloody as possible, just shy of freaking out the waitress with how insistent he was. Jesse was digging into his own steak, a bit of sauce stuck to his facial hair. Genji deigned to not point it out. 

 

“Not particularly.” He managed to murmur, after mulling over what he wanted to say. Jesse shrugged and twirled his steak knife absently between his fingers. 

 

“Then what was it all about? Ya just really didn’ wanna be crampin’ some poor lady’s style? Needed to hit the auto-eject button?” News had spread pretty fast about Genji’s incident with Amelie Guillard. She was campus sweetheart despite having only a week and a half under her belt. It made sense. She seemed like a really nice woman. 

 

“I don’t know. I guess you’re right. Maybe I’m just into really freaky shit and didn’t know it yet.” The nonchalance mustered up by Genji should have won him an academy award. Jesse just laughed at him, head tipped back slightly. Genji stared at his neck in silence. 

 

“I hope you don’t bite everyone you kiss, chief. Would put some of us in a real bad spot.” Genji managed to wrench his gaze away finally, staring down at his plate as he shoved more of his steak into his mouth. It was unsatisfying. All he could think about while he ate was the traces of blood he’d managed to draw from Amelie, the way it had tasted. 

 

“Maybe, maybe not. Why, you planning on something I’m not aware of? Not everyone likes being kissed unannounced. You might end up with more than just a bite.” 

 

“Noted. I’ll be sure to tell ya about m’plans before I try somethin’.” There it was. Jesse would slip up and say something like that and it’d make Genji shut down and then the dance would repeat all over again. They were flitting around one another, carefully feeling out what was right and wrong. If only Jesse knew how wrong the whole thing actually was. 

 

“Thanks for taking me out again, by the way.” Genji finally said, after a long span of silence. He had devolved to picking at his steak. He didn’t feel like forcing himself to eat the rest of it but the meal had been more than just a little expensive; Jesse had insisted on paying again. 

 

“A’course. I like your company. You’re… was’it mama’s say when they don’t wanna insult ya? Unique? You’re unique.” 

 

“Oh, gee, thanks.” Jesse laughed again and something in Genji’s chest tightened. God he wished this was happening two weeks ago. Back when he was normal, when he could’ve brought Jesse home and fucked him senseless without worrying that he might rip his jugular out in the heat of the moment. 

 

There was no time for that. Genji wasn’t normal anymore. He’d just have to deal with that. 

 

“I mean it though! You’re not a bad guy. A lil weird, but ain’t we all? I do gotta say though, you’re not the first guy I’ve met with a penchant for biting people. If it makes ya feel any better.” 

 

“Sure does, Jesse, thanks.” He couldn’t suppress the sarcasm in his voice, but Jesse didn’t seem to mind. They were having fun. Or Genji was trying to. Jesse was having fun and that was enough for Genji at the moment. He did wish he could have fun too. 

 

“Don’t let me keep you from your food though, chief. I know you’re prolly real hungry.” Genji looked back down at his food and felt his stomach curl in disgust. He swallowed tightly and stabbed another piece onto his fork. He didn’t care if it killed him, he’d finish eating this fucking steak. For Jesse, if for anyone. 

 

“It’s fine, I like listening to you talk. Even if you do it a lot.” Jesse’s eyebrows popped up in surprise as Genji forced himself to chew his lukewarm food, looking up at the man through his eyelashes. Slowly the surprise faded to a half smile as Jesse shook his head and went back to finishing off his own meal. 

 

The drive back to their shared new home was quiet but not uncomfortable. Once more, Jesse had the radio on and was singing along occasionally. Genji was curled up in the passenger seat listening to him, head lolled as he stared at Jesse’s profile. In the fading light of the day, with the sunbeams catching in his irises, Jesse looked pretty breathtaking. 

 

Genji’s stomach gurgled in protest, still upset from being forced to digest so much food it didn’t want. Instead of paying it any heed, he focused on the warmth spreading in his chest. He wouldn’t say he was falling in love, not so quickly. Genji had never been guarded but he wasn’t one to throw his heart around without caution. But it was something, something a little more than the lust and a lot more than the hunger. 

 

“Hey,” Jesse’s gaze flickered slightly, his attention captured. He hummed his acknowledgement as Genji paused, trying to figure what he had been going to say. Nothing came to mind. Maybe he’d just wanted Jesse’s attention. He laughed at himself softly and shook his head. “Nothing.” 

 

Back in their room, the two men sat side by side on the futon with Jesse’s blanket thrown over their shoulders. The man had recorded a couple episodes of the soap opera Genji had stumbled upon earlier. Pressed snugly together, despite the room on the futon, they watched Bitchy Meghan with an ‘H’ get her dues.

 

Despite everything, in that moment, Genji managed to feel normal again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me? Self indulgent? Maybe. But this is fanfic world, baby, we do whatever the HELL we want!! Anyways, with everything going on, I figured I'd give Genji a little break. 
> 
> Plus, I can't just have the McGenji tag on here and just TEASE you guys with it. Might as well throw you a bone. So here's your bone, one whole chapter of nothing but Genji and Jesse being nerds.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

“There was another car accident out on that back road apparently.” Emily had said, conversationally, over breakfast. The whole group looked like shit after a late night of trying to stealthily cram for a test while being forced to endure another late night party call. Genji had sat outside most of the night, graciously joined by Lena and Emily after the two had gotten their fill of the shenanigans. Now, all of them a little worse for wear, they nursed coffee over meager breakfasts. 

 

“Another? Yeesh, you’d think they’da done somethin’ about that by now. That road’s real dangerous.” Lena tutted softly, shaking her head. Jesse’s brow furrowed as he tilted his cup to and fro, swirling the coffee within. 

 

“You mean the one comin’ into the grounds, from the gas station?” Genji’s brain was running on just about its last leg, frazzled from days of not eating properly and lack of proper sleep. He listened to the conversation but it took him several seconds each addition to process what was said. 

 

“Yeah. Took ‘em a couple days to even realize there was another crash. Is crazy, really. I heard the Elders talkin’ about it last night. Apparently this isn’t even the first one since the semester startin’. Can you believe that, huh?” The realization was quite late. In fact it was so delayed, that by the time Genji suddenly sucked air through his teeth and sat up straight, the others were talking about something else. Jesse’s hand came down and gently cupped Genji’s lower back before retreating again. 

 

“You alright there?” Lena inquired, finger tapping against the side of her cup. Genji nodded, rubbing his eyes. 

 

“Sorry, just… Coffee’s kicking in.” Emily was the only one to laugh, a half-hearted thing that didn’t help to quell Genji’s nerves. He could see the worry and suspicion in her eyes, could practically smell the apprehension. Actually, Genji wouldn’t be surprised if he really could smell it-- wouldn’t be the weirdest thing about him lately. 

 

A lull in conversation occurred at this point as the group contemplated their drinks. Genji was still internally freaking out nonetheless. That road, that fucking road. It was the one Jesse always took on his way off campus, the one Hanzo and he had- He stopped the thought there and suddenly felt very sick to his stomach. 

 

“I have to… go. I’ll see you guys later.” Genji was up and walking off briskly before anyone could give him a goodbye in return. He needed to find his brother. It was a little too late that he realized he had no idea where to start looking. Maybe the city morgue? The thought brought grim amusement. 

 

Despite the anti-climaticism of it, Genji simply texted Hanzo to ask where he was. It took several agonizing minutes for him to get an answer. He was up in his room, with company. The thought of Hanzo with another human being, in his room, made Genji’s stomach turn. He wasn’t so sure he trusted Hanzo anymore to be with other people- people that weren’t like them. 

 

When he arrived, Genji was just a bit surprised to say the least. Gabriel and some guy Genji just plain didn’t recognize were both chilling in Hanzo’s living quarters, take out boxes strewn between them while Hanzo sat a little ways away with a blunt between his teeth. 

 

“Took you long enough. Get lost?” Genji stared at Gabriel and Gabriel stared at him. He tried to smile but he was pretty sure it was just a grimace. It was returned to him in kind as Gabriel slowly peeled his gaze away and turned back to the other man sitting across from him. 

 

“N… No. Hanzo, what’s--” 

 

“I’m allowed to have friends.” Hanzo’s voice was cold, gaze unreadable as he spoke around his smoke. 

 

“You two going to be done soon? I can’t eat in these conditions.” Hanzo waved a hand flippantly at Gabe’s interjection. Genji stood there feeling like a moron for a while before finally walking right up to Hanzo and staring at him in silence. His brother straight up ignored him for several minutes before decided to acknowledge his looming presence. 

 

“What do you want, Genji. I thought you didn’t need my help.” Gabe groaned softly at this but didn’t say much else. 

 

“I needed to talk to you about your help, actually. Like how long you’ve been helping, yourself.” Something flashed across Hanzo’s face at Genji’s words. His mouth pulled taunt and a sneer started to form. 

 

“You two are weird.” Came a soft grumble from the thus unnamed blond that was sitting with Gabe. Genji didn’t pay him much mind. 

 

“Long enough. Why do you care.” 

 

“Why do you fucking think I care, you ass?” 

 

“God, I’m so fucking glad I don’t have siblings. Do you deal with this shit, Jack?” Gabriel exhaled exasperatedly. Jack merely shrugged and stabbed more food onto his plastic fork. Genji really fucking wished they weren’t here right now. 

 

“About two years.” 

 

“How often.”

 

“A couple of times a month.” 

 

“Has it been worse?” Hanzo faltered, mouth opening as if he were going to say something before snapping shut. His brow furrowed. Genji didn’t like that. Finally he stood, pinching his blunt out and tucking it behind his ear. Genji let Hanzo grab him by the forearm and drag him back into his room, leaving Gabe and Jack to their meals. 

 

“Genji…” Hanzo’s tone was already reprimanding and Genji just wasn’t in the mood for it. 

 

“Don’t. I don’t care. I’m not going to fucking eat people, Hanzo. I just want to know, has it gotten worse.” 

 

“I don’t know. I don’t exactly have a metric for this. Genji, you need to eat. If you don’t you’re only going to make it harder on yourself.” No shit. It had only been a couple of days since he’d eaten that chicken and even eating meat he felt like he was starving himself. 

 

“I’d rather die, thanks.” This seemed to do it for Hanzo and he grabbed Genji by the front of his shirt, face twisted exaggeratedly with anger that was bordering on white hot rage. He shoved Genji back hard, practically slamming him into door. A soft ‘what the fuck’ came from behind it, presumably from Jack. 

 

“Don’t you fucking say that. Don’t you dare. You’re not going to die. I’m not going to let you.” It was like a promise and a curse in one. Shaking slightly, Genji put both hands on Hanzo’s shoulders and pushed him back. He didn’t so much as budge. 

 

“Fuck you-- don’t act like you care!” 

 

“I do care! I do fucking care! Why do you insist on being so difficult? What do you gain from doing this to yourself? From doing this to me?” Hanzo’s face was starting to flush darkly with emotion, eyes glittering wetly as he tried to control himself. Genji found a dark satisfaction in it. Hanzo had always been an angry crier. 

 

“Stop making this about yourself, jackass!” 

 

“You came to me, Genji! I told you, I told you I wouldn’t leave you again. Why do you insist on pushing me away?” Genji ran his hands through his hair, squeezing his eyes shut and clenching his jaw. Hanzo had been living like this for nearly three years. It was no wonder he was so fucking delusional, so detached from the reality of the situation. 

 

“You. Fucking. Eat people! You kill people and you eat them! You’re a fucking psychopath!” A hard slap to the face shut Genji up quickly as he remembered they were not actually alone. Hanzo’s hand clamped over his mouth nonetheless and he sat very, very close to him. His teeth were bared at Genji; he couldn’t suppress the feeling of fear that coursed through him. It was like being pinned down by a wild animal and just praying it would kill you quickly. 

 

A long span of silence followed. Hanzo’s hand slowly withdrew and he let Genji go. The tension had plateaued off, leaving the air around them chilled. Genji watched as his brother wiped at his eyes in frustration, jaw clenched tightly. 

 

“I’m trying, Genji. I’m trying to make this work. Okay? Would you rather we both just starve?” Hanzo’s voice was raw, barely there in the quiet. Genji swallowed thickly, faltering as Hanzo stared him down. 

 

“I don’t know. Maybe. Maybe it’d be better that way.” Watching Hanzo’s expression warp with pain was actually almost enough to break Genji’s heart. His breath caught in his throat and he wanted to take it back immediately. He didn’t mean it, he didn’t mean it. It was too late, of course. He’d already said it. 

 

“Just, go. Just go, Genji. When you’re ready, then you can come back.” Hanzo looked about at his wits end, deflated. Genji’s mouth worked around words he wanted to say but in the end none of them would come out. Instead, he turned away and did just as Hanzo told him to do. As he was leaving he caught the sharp eyes of both Gabe and Jack on his back. 

 

Could he make anymore of an ass of himself?


	16. Chapter Sixteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning for Dubious Consent, Explicit Cannibalism, and Accidental Self-harm.

Genji closed his mouth around a thick chord of muscle, face buried into the thigh of a man he’d spent quite some time thinking about already. Breath coming in labored huffs, he moaned around the flesh in his mouth and forced his teeth through the tensing fibres. The meat twitched and strained in resistance before pearly teeth snapped the pathways transmitting sensation and movement. Something of a groan emitted from above Genji, a hand brushing through his hair. 

 

He let his hazy eyes skim upwards. Past the fuzzy navel, the broad chest, the bloodied neck. He couldn’t drag his eyes further than the familiar smile. He focused on the smile and didn’t look up, mouth working around the meat he’d torn free. The hand in his hair continued fondly scratching his scalp, calming him. 

 

Dimly a voice bubbled through, but it was like trying to decipher words spoken underwater. The voice, despite its distortion, made a shiver race its way down Genji’s spine. He licked his lips. The smile grew. He felt himself smiling back, licking his teeth this time in a vain effort to wash the blood from them. 

 

He lowered his face again, nuzzling into the hole he’d ripped out of the flesh there. This was nice. Tilting his head slightly so he could get further in, Genji ran his tongue over the bit of exposed bone he’d excavated out. The undisturbed strands of muscle contracted in response, something like a hum of approval coming from the man Genji was-- was servicing the right word for all of this? 

 

Despite already being rather deep into the meat of his leg, Genji’s mouth watered at the prospect of cracking the bone open and lapping out the marrow. He laved his tongue over it again, nibbling at the surrounding flesh in hopes of exposing more of the bone. It was with great disappointment he realized he’d surely have to remove all of the meat surrounding it to get to what he really wanted. 

 

“Genji.” It was the first time the man above him had actually spoken comprehensible words and it made Genji freeze in place. No. No. Not now. 

 

“Genji!” This time more insistent. Genji squeezed his eyes shut and tried to find himself. His stomach suddenly exploded with agony. 

 

Jesse was hovering over Genji now rather than reclining under his mouth. He looked alarmed and worried beyond belief. The room came into focus. Genji was on the futon, where he’d fallen asleep when he stumbled perhaps a bit drunk and very upset during the wee hours of the morning. He felt weak. 

 

“What-- What is it?” His voice came out slurred and thick and he was vaguely aware of something dripping off his lips. For a horrified moment he thought he’d done something terrible, something outside of that dream that he had managed to find some twisted solace in. Jesse’s brow remained knit together and he worked his mouth in silence. 

 

“You… Your mouth.” His mouth?... Genji brought a hand up to his lips and immediately felt what was wrong. Fuck, he’d been practically chewing his lip off in his sleep. The whole thing was raw and bloodied and he could feel that the insides of his cheeks hadn’t been safe either. Fingertips blooded, he wiped them off on his shorts. 

 

“Sorry… Thanks for waking me up.” He wasn’t actually thankful, rather felt some sort of jaded and misdirected anger towards Jesse for disrupting him. Jesse seemed to want to say something but couldn’t bring himself to do it, face twisted with some kind of sympathetic pain as he continued to trap Genji down against the futon with his presence 

 

“You’re not okay.” Genji avoided Jesse’s stare. Stating the obvious, wasn’t he? He hadn’t been okay. Not through this entire time. When he looked in the mirror he could see how the lack of food and proper sleep was getting to him, blanching his skin and causing his cheeks to shallow out. The dark circles ringing around his eyes, the pitiful way he’d started to actually fucking drool when Jesse- or anyone for that matter- got too close to him. 

 

“I know.” Genji finally settled. He’d stopped crying about this pretty soon after the hunger had really settled in. He had no idea what it had meant to starve until now. It was excruciating. Jesse drew back, giving Genji room to finally sit up. The action exhausted him. 

 

“You need, help.” Yeah, probably. Genji focused on just breathing. He’d long since resigned himself that he was probably going to die. Part of him fought vainly against this proclamation, screaming for food, for life. He stared at Jesse’s mouth. 

 

“I don’t know how t'help you.” Jesse sounded truly upset at his obvious admission. Genji slowly blinked. He didn’t even know how to help himself. Well, he did, but he’d already established that he would never-

He would never. 

 

He would never…

 

Jesse’s rigidity could be chalked up to surprise and to be entirely fair Genji didn’t even register what he was doing for a couple moment. Despite the pain, he continued to work his mouth against Jesse’s with practiced ease. He’d kissed many people in his lifetime. Hesitant hands came up to his chest before half heartedly pushing him away. Genji licked his lips. 

 

“Genji, I… I don’t think that’s a good idea.” His blood was smeared over Jesse’s mouth, a gaudy red. 

 

“You wanted to help me, right?” This was wrong. Genji knew it was wrong. Jesse looked like he wanted to run and he was in the right to feel so. If he was more right in the head, Genji would have stopped there, wouldn’t have started to begin with. He liked Jesse. He did. He like liked him, even. He could see himself building a decent relationship with this man. 

 

He was starving. 

 

“This isn’t what you need.” Jesse sounded less than convinced with himself, hesitant in a way Genji had never seen him. He hadn’t even been sure hesitance was a thing Jesse experienced. He pushed forward again, catching Jesse’s idled mouth with his own. He let his hands come to Jesse’s stomach, creeping their way up his torso. Jesse nudged him away again, turning his face slightly. 

 

“Please... Genji, you need help.” 

 

“Help me.” He hadn’t meant it to come out so choked, so sincere. Then again, what else could it have possibly sounded like than a plea? Anything, anything-- something, please. Genji let his fingers curl into Jesse’s shirt, body shaking slightly as he took a deep breath. Jesse wouldn’t look at him. Maybe couldn’t. Silence, as Genji felt the tip of the blade dangle over his head. 

 

“Okay…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I spent a while thinking on what to continue on with. An indeterminate amount of time later, but not too far later, here we are. Debating on if I should go through and bump the rating up to E for Naughty with the next chapter or just skip it and try to keep things as clean as a fic about explicit cannibalism with rampart sexual undertones can be. Be proud of me, I managed to write this rather than running off to play with other fanfics I have in store for the future,,,,,


	17. Chapter Seventeen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning for benign sexual content, dubious consent, and self harm.

It was in an exhale. Releasing a breath he hadn’t even known he’d been holding and letting it whisper out of him as he relaxed, let go. Jesse’s hand pressed harder to Genji’s thigh, face set in a grim expression entirely unbefitting of their current position. Genji kissed his face anyways, letting himself taste the man in small increments. A nip to the lip, a nibble to the shoulder, sucking a blooming bruise to his neck. 

 

Jesse was tender and it was heartbreaking. Despite the faraway look in his eyes, he touched softly and held firmly. It was befitting of him but Genji felt ravenous. He drew his nails across the man’s back and clenched around his waist with the leg that wasn’t being held up and aside. Jesse muttered something and cant his hips forward a little rougher, prompting Genji to draw air through his teeth. 

 

Past the pleasure sat the buzz of discordant emotion-- guilt, shame, regret. It wasn’t right. This should be different. Those were feelings for later. He pulled Jesse down again, mashing their mouths together. Jesse was compliant for a moment before turning his head slightly and glancing away. Genji took this as his cue to turn his attention back to Jesse’s neck and shoulders.

 

Jesse made a small noise of pain and let one hand fist itself into Genji’s hair, pulling him off. The teeth imprints that Genji had left in his skin were the testament to how hard he’d bitten. Just a little more, that was all he needed. Clinging desperately, Genji grunted and shifted impatiently to push himself down. Jesse seemed to take the hint somewhat, thrusting faster. 

 

Another noise of pain, this time sharper and followed by a hissed curse. Genji couldn’t help the desperate moan this time as his head was yanked back again. He was so close, so close. He just needed, he just needed to--

 

When Genji went to sink his teeth in again, he simply missed Jesse completely and ended up biting into his own arm. He broke skin easily, blood washing over his tongue as he screamed his release, eyes screwed shut tightly and breathing labored. Jesse stilled almost immediately, stiff as he listened to Genji ride off the high. 

 

It took a moment to actually take his teeth out. Pain immediately radiated from the bite wound; it felt dulled. Taking a deep breath, Genji let himself go limp. Jesse pulled out, faster than Genji would have liked, and was quick to withdraw.

 

“Sorry.” Was all he got out, a weak smile gracing his face as he stared at the ceiling. It appeared to be Jesse’s turn to lie. 

 

“It’s fine.” Able to think, even for a moment, about something other than the pain of his body-- to say Genji’s heart twisted into itself was fitting enough. The gravity of what he’d done weighed down upon him quite suddenly. He reached out to Jesse only to be met with a shrug. 

 

“Gonna take a shower.” It wasn’t fair. More specifically it wasn’t fair to Jesse. Genji rolled onto his side, absently licking his wound. His own blood didn’t taste much different to him than it had before all of this started. Metallic, sharp, and generally a bit unpleasant. It would have to hold him over. 

 

When Jesse finally came out of the shower, which wasn’t for quite a while, Genji was dressed again and sitting on the floor with a bottle of water held against his face. Genji didn’t expect the man to sit down next to him. 

 

“We shouldn’t have done that.” Genji wanted to correct him that he shouldn’t have done this- Jesse was in no way at fault in this. Instead he merely grunted in affirmation. 

 

“I’m sorry.” Jesse looked up when Genji apologized. Genji realized he’d been crying, likely in the shower where Genji couldn’t see or hear it. The thought made him feel hollow. They sat in silence after that while they stared at the blank TV and tried to ignore their own reflections. 

 

Something settled in Genji, in that moment, as he thought about his situation. About how it was affecting others around him. How much it was hurting and ruining not only him, but now his friends. He thought back to what Hanzo had said. Hanzo…

 

Genji got up slowly, wobbling on his legs slightly. Jesse once more looked his way, watching him warily with a hint of worry. Genji grimaced at him; he was incapable of mustering up a smile. He gave a hushed apology once more and then a goodbye. 

 

He couldn’t let it go any farther.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to formally apologize to everyone reading this for what's culminated. But then again, what did you expect from a fanfic about cannibalism? Not very much good, I'd hope.
> 
> I'm going to be guessing that I'll have a couple more chapters after this! I sorta wanna get it all wrapped up, even though as it is I'm sure I could just keep going with Genji and his life but I have more FUN fanfics to write. Ones that don't involve wanting to eat your crush alive. 
> 
> Comments appreciated! Kudos as well. Share with your friends with strong stomachs and specific tastes! Also yes, this was shorter than previous chapters. You're not just imagining things


	18. Chapter Eighteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for self mutilation in the form of amputation and semi-explicit flesh eating. Hanzo would do anything for his little brother, when it came down to it.

Hanzo’s face twisted immediately from annoyance to horror when he opened the door to find Genji standing sullenly and sunken in on himself. He ushered him in quickly, keeping Umi at bay as she danced around their legs nervously. When Genji nearly crumpled to the floor, Hanzo was quick to lift him up with ease and carry him the rest of the way to his bedroom. 

 

“Genji… Genji… Oh, Genji…” Normally the tone Hanzo was using with him would have elicited a reaction of spite; Genji couldn’t bring himself to expend the energy to do so. The walk over had felt like miles, hours rather than minutes. He felt himself being laid on a bed. Hanzo’s hand felt cold against his face, which Genji supposed could only mean he himself was burning up. 

 

“I did something,” He managed to mutter. Hanzo leaned in, tilting his head to hear his brother better. “To Jesse. I did something to him. Bad.” Alarm raced across Hanzo’s features before Genji grunted and tried to roll onto his side. Hanzo stopped him, keeping him on his back. 

 

“You didn’t kill him, did you?” Genji couldn’t help the delirious little laugh that bubbled out of him. God, no, he couldn’t. His brother’s expression twitched with some unreadable emotion at the laughter. 

 

“No… No.” 

 

“That’s all that matters. Genji… Fuck. You look like shit. I can’t believe you lasted for as long as you did…” Hanzo took Genji’s arm up, inspecting the bite wound that sat there. It wasn’t bleeding anymore. Hanzo sniffed it curiously before looking at Genji again, critically. 

 

“Just, make it stop.” He wanted to cry, but no tears would come. Instead he just closed his eyes and focused on breathing. He hurt, he hurt so fucking bad, all over. Part of him was hoping maybe Hanzo would snap his neck like he did that poor woman. He felt he was in just about the same state as she had been. Just barely there, only breathing for a lack of anything else to do. 

 

“I will. I will… You have to, to trust me. Okay? Genji? Hey, come on, look at me.” All Hanzo got in response was a whine, but it was enough considering Genji’s situation. He wasn’t as far gone as Hanzo had been when he’d finally snapped. Hadn’t quite gotten to the breaking point. He had time but only a little. 

 

“You’re being a big baby… Need your big brother to take care of you all over again. Just like when we were kids. If you so much as had the sniffles…” Hanzo was more talking for his own pleasure than Genji’s, but it was better than silence. He sat stroking Genji’s hair as he talked aloud. He needed to think quickly about his next move. Genji needed food. He didn’t have time to test his chances on the road. Wasn’t like he could go to the store and get a package of human flesh. 

 

“I’m going to be right back, Genji. Stay with me, okay? You were right, to be upset with me. But I made you a promise. I’m going to take care of you.” Hanzo didn’t know if Genji was even listening to him. He hoped he was but it may be better he not be totally there for what he was about to do. 

 

He had the tools necessary already, from when his methods had been messier and less calculated. If people could do this in the middle of battlefields, then a cushy college dorm wouldn’t be the worst place… right? Hanzo cast Genji a glance as he stood up and went to gather his materials. 

 

Painkillers, alcohol, elastic bands, ice… Hanzo glanced over his phone, making sure there wasn’t anything he was missing. He had rudimentary instructions pulled up and had set emergency medical to speed dial. This was risky but he’d rather give himself a chance than bleed out. 

 

“If you ever complain about something to me again, I’ll strangle you.” Genji made a weak groan in protest as Hanzo entered the bathroom connected to his room and stripped his pants off. He took a big swig of liquor and took a deep breath as he eased his bare leg into the ice he’d dumped into the bath. 

 

The tourniquet was tied. His leg numb. His brother, half dead in the next room. Hanzo stared down at the discolored skin and clenched his jaw tightly. This was for Genji. Umi sat patiently by the door, tail thumping anxiously as she watched Hanzo. Giving a prod and deeming the area numb enough, Hanzo leaned back to grab the handsaw. Now or never. 

 

Breaking skin was harder than Hanzo had expected. It had always seemed like it was easy to do so, when it came to other people. It took a surprising amount of effort though, pushing and ripping messily. Umi whined and laid down, tongue lolling out of her mouth as she panted noisily. Hanzo grunted as he exerted more strength, a dull pain echoing from below the tourniquet as he got through skin and into muscle. 

 

It was unclear when the shock actually set in. Hanzo just knew he was shaking and cold and it was getting hard to grip the handsaw. He’d already downed half the bottle of alcohol and taken another handful of painkiller. Umi’s panting and low growling was mirrored in his own noises as he pushed through his task dutifully. He’d hit bone already at least.

 

The stench of his own blood was nauseating. It never had been pleasant before, but it was worse now as he watched it leak out past the vice grip of the tourniquet and spill over the ice. 

 

Genji was wailing pitifully from the bedroom. Hanzo knew it was because he could smell it. Hell, a normal person could probably smell all this gore. Umi whined loudly and the clack of nails on tile alerted Hanzo that she was coming up behind him. Her normally cold snout felt warm against his lower back. 

 

“Almost done. Almost. Almost.” The pain was maddening, alcohol and painkillers aside. It was deep and throbbing past his determination, not just physical but mental, as he split the flesh apart to see the bone within. Hanzo took a gulp of air in and tipped his head back, clenching his teeth tightly and trying to hold it together. 

 

Just a little more, just a little longer. 

 

The last stretch was excruciating. At some point the tears came. Better late than never, Hanzo mused in delirium. Part of him wanted to stop, Genji be damned, but a much larger part of him was set to this. He would live, probably. Genji may not if he didn’t do this. 

 

The limb was practically ripped off, Hanzo wanting to be done with this as he severed the last of the skin and muscle with a hard tug and a yell. He sat there and stared at it for some time, processing what he had done and trying to come to terms with it all through the blood loss. Genji first, then he could call for help. 

 

When Hanzo exited the bathroom, towel secured around his stump of a leg and leaning heavily upon the wall, Genji was prone but awake. He was staring glassy eyed in Hanzo’s direction, drool collected around his lips. 

 

“I’m not… I’m not carrying you. Get your, ass over here, Genji.” 

 

The smell of blood was clinging thickly to the air and everything in Genji now was telling him to follow his nose to it. When Hanzo finally appeared from the bathroom, Genji didn’t even register his strange acquaintance with the wall or the odd gait. When he tried to move his mouth to respond to his brother, all Genji got for his trouble was drool dribbling down the front of him. Weakly, he rolled himself out of bed and landed on the floor with a thump. 

 

With all the grace he could muster, he crawled on hand and knee to the bathroom. Umi was sitting there in the middle of the mess, tail swinging a mile a minute as she seemed to inspect the carnage. Genji didn’t pay her any mind, hurriedly dragging his tongue over the blood that had pooled on the floor. 

 

For how long Genji was there licking all the blood he could find off the floor, he wasn’t sure. He was vaguely aware that Hanzo had come back into the bathroom, taking a heavy seat on the toilet and watching him. 

 

“There.” A gesture. Genji followed it to the small bathtub, pulling himself up over the side. He didn’t have much a mind to think about anything, spying the leg half submerged in ice. He practically threw himself into the slurry of half frozen water and blood, grabbing the limb teeth first and groaning. 

 

It was indescribable. Genji was pretty sure this was the sensation of truly eating for the first time. Every craving he’d had since this started was suddenly being sated, smoothed over and fulfilled in the best ways possible. It didn’t take him long to strip most of the meat off, gnawing on the bone briefly before moving on. By the time coherent thought started to peek back through the fog, Genji had cleared away down to the ankle. 

 

He stopped what he was doing, smacking his lips and pushing himself out of the tub. He was cold and wet but he felt better than he had in a while now. Better even than before this nightmare started. Umi’s whine caught his attention and he twisted in place to look at her. 

 

The realization hit Genji like a bag of bricks as he took in Hanzo, pale as death and taking in shallow rattling breaths. He swallowed tightly and forced himself to look down. The towel wrapped around where Hanzo’s leg now ended was soaked with blood. A small part of him wanted to suck it out of the fabric, but a much bigger part of him was absolutely panicking. Somehow, through all of it, Hanzo managed to smile at him. Genji may or may not have wanted to punch him in the mouth. 

 

Instead of being irrational, for once in his life Genji decided his emotions could wait. So, he wrenched the phone out of Hanzo’s hand and called for help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end is nearing. You wouldn't believe it with how absolutely batshit wild things are going at the moment, but it's the truth. Hope you're all enjoying yourselves! Hope this was what you signed up for. Comments and kudos appreciated. Please, do comment. Please.


	19. Chapter Nineteen

Hospitals were unnerving enough already. Genji had only been in one once before; that had been when he had managed to break his arm while trying to show off to someone. Young and dumb, at the time... Curled up in a waiting room chair he couldn’t help but wish he’d snapped his fucking neck instead. Maybe they would have avoided all of this. 

 

His dad was rubbing circles into his back, an attempt at soothing his youngest while they awaited for news on Hanzo’s condition. He’d lost a lot of blood. In the hospital bathroom, Genji had tried to make himself vomit; his body refused to return what it had taken. A shiver racked over Genji’s body as he thought once more over what had transpired. 

 

“Shimada?” Sojiro and Genji alike looked up when their last name was called. It had been hours upon hours. The hospital had denied either of them access since Hanzo had been in critical condition upon arriving. Genji caught the nurse’s eyes lingering on him and steeled his gaze in return. He kept telling himself there was no way anyone could know. Not the truth, at least. 

 

“How is he?” The nurse’s gaze slid back to Sojiro and she gave a little tight lipped smile. 

 

“He’s still hanging in there. The staff has managed to get him stabilized but…” She trailed off. Sojiro lifted a brow up, hand still sitting on Genji’s back. The nurse managed a wry smile before shaking her head. It wouldn’t be until much later that she came back to tell them they could see him now. 

 

Genji was the first one in the room, nearly bumbling into another nurse on their way out. Hanzo looked horrible. He had all sorts of tubes going in and out of him, many of them just for blood transfusion. He took one side of the bed and his father took the other. 

 

“You’re looking better already, Hanzo.” At Sojiro’s words, Hanzo managed a dry laugh. Genji couldn’t bring himself to form words quite yet as he stared at the heavy bandaging that now wrapped Hanzo’s elevated injury. He held tightly to Hanzo’s hand instead and was grateful when he gripped just as tightly back. 

 

“Sorry to drag you out here on such short notice, father.” Sojiro’s face twisted with some form of grief as he pushed a hand through Hanzo’s bangs and cupped his face. 

 

“I only wish you had invited me sooner. Perhaps before you decided to go through such grave measures to garner my attention, hm?” Genji sunk down further, slotting himself up against Hanzo as he laid his torso over the little space left on the hospital bed. Sojiro went to take a seat. 

 

“It is time to tell me the truth.” He stated simply. His expression seemed weary. Hanzo stiffened. Genji looked up at him and hoped his face didn’t give away how sick he suddenly felt. 

 

“There’s nothing to tell.” Hanzo was on the defense and it was immediately obvious. His grip on Genji’s hand tightened to nearly painful; Genji held on harder. Sojiro shook his head and sighed. 

 

“You should not make it a habit to lie to me, Hanzo. You are transparent as ever. Genji? Is there anything you would like to tell me?” Having his father’s attention turned to him made Genji squirm in place. The last time someone had asked him for honesty… 

 

“I… I don’t know.” He answered. It was better than saying no. Hanzo hissed at him softly. He met his eyes and found him glaring. Not harshly but with just enough reprimand that Genji closed his mouth despite himself. Sojiro sighed. Both of his sons moved their gaze back to him. 

 

“It’s… A shame your mother is not here with us. She would be… She would be better at handling this conversation.” A tense pause. “You should have told us. Told us sooner. We could have helped you.” Sojiro stood and closed the room door. When he turned back to his sons he was in the middle of unbuttoning his shirt. 

 

“We thought you were safe… That, if you had not had any signs of it yet that maybe it was just a fluke. That you would both be alright.” Genji slipped his hand from Hanzo’s at last and stood up straight. He’d never seen his father undressed before and he wasn’t sure he was ready for the reason why. 

 

“Father…” Hanzo was putting the piece together already. Genji didn’t want to. So much had already happened. He wasn’t sure he could take anymore. He steeled his upper lip and stood his ground. Perhaps if he willed it hard enough this would all come to an end here and now, would stop once and for all. Sojiro stood still for a moment, shirt unbuttoned but not yet opened. 

 

“I am sorry to have failed you as a father. If I had done my job properly you would have felt safe to come to me with your problems, no matter what.”

 

“No.” Hanzo’s voice broke now as he let his head fall back against the pillows, refusing to look at what was being shown to him. Genji put a hand to his mouth. 

 

“I tried… I tried as well. For your mother.” Gnarled and pitted scars littered Sojiro’s torso. Genji couldn’t take his eyes off of them. The implication of them. A shudder of an inhale fluttered past his lips. Faintly, Genji was aware of Hanzo sobbing. The world swayed beneath his feet. Sojiro smiled sadly.

 

“I know you two will figure something out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The final official chapter! It's been wild, lads. From start to finish I was feeling through the dark a bit on how close to the movie I wanted to go! Definitely split off in many regards but hey! What's really weird is the scene I originally started writing for never made it into the fic... Oops. Anyways, we have an epilogue in store for us and then it's so long! 
> 
> If you wanna get some sneaks into my creative process and ideas then you can find me on Twitter @conlainn


	20. Epilogue

The buzz of insects in the night and the sound of distant urban life lulled Genji into a slight stupor. He was waiting, patiently, for the man of the hour to make his appearance. The two had both ended up late to their date. Genji because of his session with his therapist running overtime when the two had decided to take their talk off the books and into a cafe; Jesse because of a work emergency that required his utmost attention. It didn’t matter too much to Genji in the end. He was fine waiting. 

 

When Jesse did finally arrive he seemed exhausted. He had a blanket under one arm and a basket in the other and when he set his gaze on Genji a smile bloomed on his face. Genji smiled back, waving at him before standing to help him spread the blanket. He recognized it, of course. It was the one from back in their college days. 

 

“Sorry, sugar, ended up a lil later than I anticipated. Hope I didn’t keep you waitin’?” Jesse knocked his hat back with a tap, smoothing a crease and settling onto the ground. Genji joined him. 

 

“It’s fine. A little solitude is nice sometimes. I’ll have to bring Hanzo out here sometime, when he’s feeling better.” Jesse opened the basket and set out two plates and silverware bundled in napkins. Genji picked one of them up and examined the folds. Jesse had tried to teach him how to do so once but the information had never stuck in his mind. 

 

“Yeah? How’s he holdin’ up? You visited him the other day, right?” 

 

“He is well… I tried to tell him that it would be alright for him to live with us but he declined. He likes it there.” Genji scooted closer, leaning to rest on Jesse’s shoulder. The topic of his brother was still slightly sore but things were the best they could be given the circumstances. Jesse pressed a kiss to the top of Genji’s head with a hum. 

 

“Don’t beat yourself up ‘bout it, hun. Hanzo admitted himself of his own free will. I know you keep blamin’ yourself for it but there ain’t nothin’ you did wrong.” It was the truth. Genji knew it to be the truth. Still, even with grey fizzling into the black of his hair he couldn’t completely bring himself to let go of his own griefs. They had been young at the time of course but the magnitude of it all carried deep into their lives. 

 

“You always know what to say, don’t you? Now, what’s this surprise dinner you told me about?” Genji’s hand snuck towards the basket only to get gently swat away. Jesse was grinning at him. Genji’s eye narrowed with suspicion. He watched as Jesse got up and dusted his pants off. 

 

“C’mere then. That’s my food in there. I got yours back here.” He tilted his head back towards his car. The same beat up to-Hell-and-Back Oldsmobile, the bumper a little crooked from a crude prank Genji played on Jesse once upon a time. Heart skipping a beat, Genji jumped to his feet and shadowed Jesse as he led him to the trunk. 

 

“You… you didn’t. Did you? Jesse, oh, you didn’t!” Excitement bubbled up in Genji, making him nearly giddy as he jigged in place. Jesse laughed at him heartily as he popped the trunk open and took a step back to present Genji his gift. 

 

“Anything for you, doll. Wanted you to have a special night. Even got ‘em live, just for you.” The person in the trunk was gagged and bound, alive but unconscious. They were muscular, like they were either gym rat or worked hard labor. Genji’s mouth was already watering. It’d been so, so, so long. He looked to Jesse, eyes misty as he smiled hard. 

 

“Thank you, so much. Have I told you recently that I love you? I love you so much.” 

 

“Aw shucks, honeybun, you’ll make me blush. You want me to help you carry ‘em over? I’d love to sit down with ya.” Genji hesitated a moment at the invitation. No matter how many times he did this he couldn’t help shaking the feeling one day it would be too much. That Jesse would change his mind. It was still a miracle things were they way they were. It all was really too good to be true. Jesse seemed to catch onto Genji thinking and came to his side, rubbing his arm. 

 

“Hey now, think any harder an’ somethin’ will catch fire. If you don’t wanna, just tell me.”

 

“No! No, it’s not that… I would love to eat with you, Jesse. Please?” Genji let himself be regarded for a moment before moving to grab his soon-to-be-meal’s torso. Jesse gave him a pat on the back and went for the legs. With minimal effort they transported them to the blanket, dropping them down carefully so as to not accidentally rouse them. Genji fell to his knees and stared for a moment. Jesse sat next to him, procuring a can of lemonade from the basket. 

 

“Is a beautiful night. Not as beautiful as you though.” 

 

“Please,” Genji started, snickering. “I’m concentrating.”

 

“Oh, now, don’t mind me then. Just tryin’ to set the mood.” Jesse minded his own business after that, stargazing while Genji situated himself. When he was sure Jesse truly wasn’t paying much attention, he leaned down and secured his teeth deep into the neck of the person beneath him. It didn’t take long for them to die, bleeding out into Genji’s mouth as he kept a firm hold on them. He ripped a chunk out when the body stopped twitching, licking his lips. Jesse whistled gently.

 

“Don’t quite think that’ll ever not be scary to watch.” He admitted. A flush of gentle shame overcame Genji but was quickly shooed away as Jesse sat closer and ran a hand through his hair. He leaned into it. 

 

“What did you bring for yourself?” Genji finally asked after indulging in Jesse holding his bloodied face for a moment. 

 

“You mean besides you?” Genji clucked his tongue and Jesse laughed. “Ah, some meatloaf with the fixin’s. Y’know, mashed potatoes, green beans, cornbread.” 

 

“That sounds good.” It was half a truth and half a lie. It sounded bearable if anything. Genji liked the sauce for the meatloaf at least. Not that he would be forced to eat it this time around. Once more he felt a surge of gratitude and happiness and wanted nothing more than to kiss Jesse. He abstained from it just to keep from getting blood in the man’s beard. 

 

“Hopefully it will be.” A silence fell over the two as they dug into their own respective meals. Genji watched Jesse eat as he crunched through the delicate bones of a hand. Jesse would occasionally watch him in turn though it was clear he was keeping it at a minimum so as to not spoil his own appetite. 

 

With the moon hanging high and full overhead and the sky spangled with star, the moment that the two men shared couldn’t have been more perfect for either of them. They were at peace. Precarious as it may have been, they were at peace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it. The long awaited conclusion. It was nice spending this time sharing it with people with similarly fucked up tastes as myself. I hope to see you all again while I write maybe not so messed up stuff in the future! A formal shoutout to Shoeshine for being just the best. 
> 
> I like to imagine Jesse and Genji end up in a Santa Clarita Diet-esque relationship. 
> 
> Until next time! Addio.


End file.
